Are we square pegs?????????

This was not a good Sunday morning for the Brown Family! The boys were not happy about going to church today, there were few happy hearts in our van this morning, but church is what our family does. For us, it is not about just "going to church", but about praising our Lord, studying His Word, seeking His guidance in our lives, hiding His truth in our hearts, living our life for Him, and thankfulness for all of His blessings upon our lives. Sometimes it is easy to become lazy in our flesh and not want to go, which is where our Blake and Landon were this morning. They had outright disobeyed as we walked through the church halls, by telling me they WOULD NOT GO TO SUNDAY SCHOOL after church. WRONG!!! We NEEDED Sunday school, and we were going.

Russ and I have been trying to find where we fit in at East Cooper Baptist Church. We joined a small group which meets on Sunday nights, which we felt God very vividly directed us toward. (As noted in a previous post). We do enjoy the people we are getting to know in our small group, but we feel like we need more. Sunday morning worship is GREAT! The praise and worship is great and Pastor Buster Brown is really awesome! He seems to be truly embedded in the Word of Christ and seeking to serve Him. We really do value his pastoral leadership. We have tried a Sunday morning bible study a month or so ago, and just did not feel a "fit" for Russ and I with this group. We were recommended to try another Sunday school class for young marrieds and we were very excited to try it. Our hope was to find a group of people in the same life stage as ourselves, who we could study the Word of God with on Sunday mornings, while getting to know them on a deeper more spiritual level, so as to hold one another accountable in our walk of faith. For years, we had a great Sunday school class were this goal was the same, and this goal was attained.

SO, this morning, was THE morning to try this highly recommended class. The class that was recommended by a couple of different people whom we had mentioned what we were looking for, and they said, "OH, THIS IS THAT GROUP!". So off we were...

We walked into a room with 13 couples, they looked like us in age, so we thought...AWESOME...this must be THE CLASS! Again...we walked in, no one said a word to us...no one was saying much to each other. We sat down...no one said a word to us. We sat there in silence, because the class had not yet started... and yet no one said anything. I leaned over to Russ and mentioned how weird it felt that not one person said hello to us, or introduced themselves to us, NOTHING! The leader, we supposed, told us to talk amongst ourselves since his lesson was not very long. SILENCE. Apparently, he was filling in for the regular leaders, and he was a little nervous about it. Class started, and not one person acknowledged that they had never seen us before. They had an ice breaker as we went around the room everyone had to describe what their favorite Halloween costume had been as a child, (if they were allowed to participate in Halloween), and what their least favorite candy had been.

Everyone went around, said their part, class started, class ended...not one word to the new folks... Now, I am perplexed that not one person welcomed us into this class! Isn't that what church is supposed to do? Isn't it the goal of those within the church to make people feel welcome, so they want to come back? What if we had not been Christians? Shouldn't they want us to come back? I am just in such shock at our experience that I it was all I could do not to burst into tears as we left the room. In that moment, we needed to feel connected. We needed to feel welcomed! I started feeling a little angry, and bitter. Russ asked if we would have welcomed people in the same situation if we were on the other side...ABSOLUTELY! WE ALWAYS DID! We welcomed people in to the point of almost running them off because we were TOO friendly!

I started asking Russ if maybe this was not the church home for us... but the thought of taking the boys out and looking for another fit at this time sounds so daunting. Are we square pegs trying to fit ourselves into round holes? Why does it feel like such a struggle? Lord, show us where we belong. The boys love it once they get there, I cannot imagine moving around at this point. We need guidance...and definitely more prayer...

We will probably go back to this Sunday school class next week...not because we felt welcomed (because we absolutely did not), but because it is not about us, but about what Christ wants to teach us through His word. It is my belief that God places us in situations for a reason...we will just have to wait and see what it is...