Counting my blessings!!!!!!

So, I have been very closely following 'The Biggest Loser' this season. Some seasons are "Eh" but this season has been more about new beginnings for these people than just weight loss. One contestant, in particular, has just really touched my heart. Abby! In the case that you are not watching, let me breifly tell you about Abby. Two and a half years ago, Abby found herself happily married, with a beautiful little curly red-haired five year old daughter, and a two week old little precious boy. In the blink of an eye they were all three taken from her in an auto collision caused by another driver going well over 100 miles per hour. All of them died!

Talk about tragedy... she lost everything! I cannot imagine, and would not want to imagine, how I would feel if this scenario occurred in my life. As you can imagine, she did not know how to go on living. In order to "cope" with her life, she had to stop feeling. She found herself going through the motions of life, just trying to survive day to day. She found herself given this opportunity to go on "The Biggest Loser" and in the process of trying to get her eating and fitness back in control, she found herself again. She found her ability to feel love and no longer continue "just going through the motions" but to find joy again. She says she is looking forward to her new beginning and is thankful that it is now time to start that new journey in her life.

I am pretty sure, not many of her fellow contestants have gone for any extended length of time with dry eyes, while living at the ranch with her. I can honestly say, neither have I! This woman is one of the strongest women I have ever seen. I feel like I have been right beside her on her journey and I can say that she has certainly touched MY heart. As I sat sobbing my eyeballs out, Gavin asked me if I was laughing or crying. As I scooped him up in my arms telling him how much I loved him while at the same time kissing him endlessly on his cheeks and forehead, I told him that I was, in fact, crying. I told him all that she had lost and how thankful I was for him and the rest of our family!

Our days are often very stressful when the boys get home from school... homework, arguing (UGH!), and just livin' la vida loca! The loss that Abby has suffered reminds me of how unpredictable life is, and even in the stress and frustration of our life, I have been telling the boys how thankful I am for them. Russ and I always try to do this on a daily basis anyway, but I feel even more aware of the need now.

I do not know Abby, but if I could tell her anything, I would thank her. Thank her for demonstrating the beauty of hope. She has hope for the future and in her ability to feel love again. My hope for her is that she will be blessed in ways she could never even have thought to dream. What a precious, precious person she appears to be! I believe many people will be blessed just by knowing her. In the meantime, I will count my own blessings, and enjoy each moment!

Churches for Santa?

Sadly, Blake figured out last year that Santa was not who he thought it was for all these years. :( It was awfully sad, but being too smart for his own good, he asked outright and we felt we had to tell him. We swore him to secrecy and threatened him like crazy if he breathed a word to anyone, much less his brothers. So, he really played up the Santa thing with his younger siblings, while feeling as if he was practically an adult pulling one over on his young immature little bros!

Well, just let the kids ride the bus and apparently they will learn EVERYTHING you are not ready for them to learn...aside from the most ungodly four letter words, you know like "dumb" and "heck", and "stupid" and "idiot", they also have heard all about Santa's hidden identity. Landon has been asking for a couple of weeks now for "THE TRUTH", as he calls it. "Mom, is Santa Clause real? Tell me the truth! Is he?" asks Landon.

"Cough, cough, gag, cough!" I say. "Well, who on earth told you that?" I continue.

"Well, the kids on the bus and my best friend, Ethan. Ethan says that his mom told him that the Tooth Fairy is not real and neither is Santa. His mom said that she is both of them!" is Landon's reply.

"What the ... huh? Well, that is just sad, Santa must not visit those kids!" Sweet huh! I am a great mom! NOT! So, he let's the initial interogation go at that! Yet, he still seems to ask every other day or so to tell him the truth and I just keep asking him if Santa visits HIM.

Then today, after apparently much thought and concern for the Salvation of the Soul of Santa Claus, he brings it back to the table for conversation. "Mom, I have a few more questions... Number 1. Does Santa ever die? Number 2. Does Santa believe in Jesus? Number 3. Are there churches at the North Pole for Santa to worship? Number 4. Just because Santa does nice things for kids, does not mean he is a Christian, you know! Number 5. Will I see Santa in Heaven?"

REALLY? First of all, Blake and Gavin were sitting right there...SWEET! Blake, is grinning and saying, "Sure there are churches at the North Pole, where Santa lives!" As for Gavin, who knows how much of this he is taking in, is telling Landon that he has to be real because he brought them light sabers and Clone Trooper helmets last year.

So, Landon says, "Did Santa bring those to us, Mom?"

"Well, he must have, because I do not remember buying them!" which is partially true because I have the memory of ... well, whatever has little to no memory...oh, Dory from Finding Nemo...that's who.

Oh my word! I certainly do not want to lie to him, but he is still so young. It makes me sad to see the disbelief so soon for my little Landon! UGH!

Any suggestions?

The Library Circus?

So, I have been looking for some new books to read lately, yet, not wanting to spend money buying them... so I have become a regular at our local library. It is a very small library, and they do not have many books at all, especially new ones, but I am trying to extinguish all other options before breaking down and buying more books. Did I say the local library is small? Okay, just checking!

So, as you can imagine, the idea of taking 4 book loving boys to the library with me sounds like a death threat. I mean, I am pretty sure the crazy bus would have to pick me up at the door on the way out after the nervous breakdown I would have on the inside. So, I try to go when I just have Holden with me. A much better option, right? WRONG!

Apparently, Holden thinks that the library is as good as the circus. It brings him great joy to break free from me and run squealing as fast as he can through the rows of books, (pulling them off as he goes, mind you), while trying excitedly to hide from me. He then proceeds to squeal louder, in an effort to say, "Nanny Nanny Boo Boo, you can't catch me!" Have I mentioned how small the library is? EVERYONE IN THE ENTIRE LIBRARY can hear our interaction. His squealing, and me... frantically trying to get catch him, while shushing him as quietly and as firmly as possible (very hard, by the way). Why don't you just put him in the stroller, you may ask? Oh, let me tell you why! Because in the stroller, he flails, kicks, and screams, thrusting himself back and forth as if I have him strapped into some type of electric shock table and it is going to get him at any moment. Oh, no! Crazy Library Boy needs to be free to savor the joy of the library circus.

In the meantime, I have some very random books to read, many LARGE PRINT EDITION because that was all they had...did I mention how small the library is? Can you get banned from the library? We may be a first!

Know-It-All?

Most of you know that Gavin is a true homebody in every sense of the word. He would stay at home everyday, in his pajamas and be as happy as a flea on a dog! I am pretty sure he gets it honest, as every opportunity I have to do the same, I prefer to stay in my PJ's too. Unfortunately, some days, I do stay in my PJ's, yet still leave the house..my Flamingo Road peeps can attest to it. (I really need to work on that!)

He usually has a mini meltdown when he gets up in the morning, with the concept of going to preschool for 3 1/2 looooong hours. 9:00 - 12:30 ... However, once I stick to my guns and tell him that he is going and he needs to get dressed, he does so with a happy heart and full of excitement... ? I know, I don't get it either!

However, this morning, he did not snap out of his initial contesting of getting prepared for his day. "Why do I HAVE to go to school? I already know ALL there is to know about Jesus... so why do I have to keep going to school?"

Obviously, I agreed that he knew a lot about JESUS, but asked him if he could READ...

"Well, NO! Ugh! I'll get dressed!" and we were on our way...

For I know the plans...

I was going over in my mind the other day, the series of events that lead us to finally feel like we had a place in South Florida. We moved there in August of 2002 and we were visiting First Baptist Weston, where we DID NOT feel called to when we first moved to FL. We had visited Sheridan Hills Baptist Church in September, but just felt it was a little far. However, after several months at FB Weston, in January 2003 we decided to try Sheridan again, and were immediately taken in by the Herwig family. They invited us to pizza that first night and the rest is history. It is my belief that God truly had a hand in leading us to Sheridan and to the Herwig family.

Well, we have been in Mt Pleasant for almost 4 months. We have really enjoyed East Cooper Baptist Church, our small group is good, the pastor is great...but we have not really connected yet. I am not hoping for an Emily replacement, that does not exist, but it would be nice to have maybe one friend that could provide an outlet for having next to zero adult stimulation most of the day. Apparently, Miss Donna Carole Kitchens does not have tons of time for me to chat her ear off when I drop off and pick up Gavin. APPARENTLY, there are other parents who need to drop off/pcik up their kids. Sheesh! Poor Miss Donna Carole! Many days, she is the ONLY other adult I come it contact with until Russ gets home. Russ says he has no friends either...at which point I just roll my eyes...it's that whole...at least he goes to work and has adult conversation while he is productively solving the problems of the world....okay, so that last part may not be true, but you get the point.

So, I pray that God will deliver me from this loneliness, Holden better start talking soon or else. :)

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future". Jeremiah 29:11

Worry Wart

This week at small group, we also discussed what heart conditions we may have that we would ask God to help us with... Hmmmmmm... how much paper do I have? Seriously, many people who know me well, know that worry, self-pity, and control are big issues for me. {Man it must take a lot to be my friend! :) } I worry about not being able to control the future (moves, etc) and then I feel sorry for myself for having to go through the struggle of moving and readjustment. I know that these things are sins, and that God is there ready and willing to take my worry, and my control and work things in my life for His good leaving me to be at peace and without self pity. I give it to Him...and then I take it back, then I give it to Him, then I take it back. It seems to be an unendless tug of war. I am pretty sure that I will give it to Him for good in about 3 years...when it is time to worry again! Ha ha ha!
I hope that is not the case. It is my prayer that today I will give it to Him and let Him have it... I have other things to worry about... hee hee hee... j/k

Thank the Lord for Forgiveness...but can I forgive?...

Sunday night at our small group our lesson was on FORGIVENESS! Yikes! Don't we all feel as if someone has wronged us in one way or another? Yet, how do we wrong Christ and yet he gave the ultimate forgiveness to us! I will be the first one to admit that I do not take that into full account when I think of others who have hurt me or wronged me in some way. So, today I ask God to forgive me, and thank Him for it, and feel the freedom of knowing that though it is a process, I do not feel wronged or hurt by anyone. I have a peace and a forgiveness in my heart that holds no grudges on this day.

So,...make sure ya'll treat me right. Ha ha ha!

Too much on the brain?...or not enough Ginko Biloba?

This morning I knew I had to be at Blake's school for the "Terrific Kid" ceremony. Apparently, he may be teetering on Christian counseling at home, but was selected as a Terrific Kid for the first 9 weeks of school. Only 2-3 kids per class were selected, blah, blah, blah. Very exciting and we are certainly proud, but I digress.
So, I had to wake Gavin up at 7:15, though he does not have to be at school until 9:00am, which left him a wreck. He is a true homebody, so after much tear shedding and whining (UGH) I bribed him into getting dressed so we could be at Blake's school at 8:00am for the ceremony.

At 8:20 we were done and leaving the school and I knew it was time to pay up. So we proceed to Burger King for some Cini Mini's to pay out my earlier bribe. We head back over to Gavin's school, which is right beside the boys' school, and we arrive with 15 minutes to spare. So we sit in the car for the next 15 minutes waiting for drop-off time. At 9:00, we go inside, taking Gavin to his class and to enjoy his day with Mrs. Donna Carole Kitchens. As we walked in, I saw a lady that I recognized from the church. She stated how funny it was that I am always up there...even when there is no school. HUH? WHAT WAS THAT? NO SCHOOL? She continues to go on about how it was fall break and there was no school today. Where have I been? I was in the classroom for an hour and a half on Wednesday helping with a fall party, and Gavin does not normally have school of Thursday's anyway. So somewhere along the way, I missed the fact that there was no school. I think I need to start taking some Ginko Biloba. Apparently, parenting four boys has made me loose my mind. Calgon...take me away.

Not age appropriate...

We were sitting at the dinner table the other night and Russ was telling me about an instructor who was in the hospital with kidney stones. This poor man has many ailments and this was just icing on the cake. Landon, being the nosy child that he is, was asking what was wrong and what kidney stones were. So, Russ and I go into the anatomy of the urethra and the kidneys, etc., etc., etc., when Blake abruptly stopped the conversation. He very passionately stated, "I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS IS AGE APPROPRIATE INFORMATION!"

Really? Oh, he cracks me up!

...DAILY DRAMA...

I find myself wanting to write, yet not finding the time...however, I blog in my head on the way to take the kids here and there...but that does not make it to paper (or computer) before I forget what I wanted to talk about. Why do I blog, you may ask? It is a sense of feeling like I am not crazy when I can laugh about my life...and the craziness going on day to day with these four boys.

Right now, the boys just got home from school and were MADE to practice drum and guitar by "Mom the Dictator"... leading to much drama and sass...mostly from Blake. Now, it is onto homework time which is what I like to call "2-3 hours of daily Hell"! Seriously, the day is so long as it is, then they tack on sooo much homework, of things that have many times not even been taught during the day. I have not been called to homeschool my children up to this point, so I am not really sure why I find myself teaching my children at home when they get home from 7 hours of school. (Oh, it could be the 30 kids in their class, which is absolutely RIDICULOUS!!!) It has done much to wear down a very fragile relationship between Blake and I, and with all the hormonal changes he is going through and his extreme mood swings, I certainly do NOT need help in wearing at our relationship! Sheesh!

Dear Lord...HELP! I know...this too shall pass! I need to take it to the cross...something I have not done enough of lately.