Forced Surprise Christmas Joy!

For the past couple of days, late in the evening, the UPS man has been making a stop to deliver some Christmas orders. Not sure if anyone has had my same experience, but sometimes Amazon will ship out a box that has a big ole picture of the product on the side. So, Russ and I have been trying to meet Mr. UPS at the door and not let the kids get a glimpse of the boxes.

Well, Landon has about as much self control as an dieter in Krispy Kreme (in case you have never had to diet, that equals 0), and he is so beyond hyped up this holiday season. Soooooo, when the truck is in the neighborhood, Landon knows it and he is at the door screaming, "IT IS THE DELIVERY MAN!!!"

To which, I am in another room yelling, "DO NOT GO TO THE DOOR!"

TO which HE IGNORES!

Then I continue, "I AM SERIOUS LANDON! GET AWAY FROM THE DOOR!!!"

Ignored!

Until I finally yell, "I WILL TAKE BACK EVERYTHING AND YOU WILL NOT HAVE CHRISTMAS! I WILL CALL SANTA! I MEAN IT!" Extreme? Possibly! ;-)

Russ started making fun of me and my extreme "holiday cheer" saying, "YOU WILL HAVE A SURPRISE ON CHRISTMAS MORNING, BUT YOU WILL NOT HAVE JOY UNTIL THEN...OR NO CHRISTMAS FOR YOU!"

Ok, I see that I may be a little too controlling when it comes to forced family fun! I just want them to be surprised, but I guess it does not really matter when they are surprised, right?

Praying for Zack

Landon and I watched this video this morning, and I stood their sobbing like a broken child! It is unbelievable how far this little boy has come, God is amazing! I am so touched by the unwavering faith that his family holds onto, they have truly claimed God's Word every step of their journey thus far. Amazing testimony for Him!

Also, I as I stood watching, I was reminded that when all things seem to be going well and "normal", it can all change in the blink of an eye! We are not guaranteed tomorrow, not even an hour from now. So thankful for the gift of health, my family, for four crazy, drive me insane boys, and for this day!

Fishing with Math...

This afternoon Landon was working on a homework math worksheet and was having trouble with some of the problems that were on there that he had not yet learned. He asked Blake to help him with the sheet, and Blake agreed. So, Landon asked Blake what the answer was to one of the questions, and Blake replied, "Landon, I will not tell you the answer! ... If you give a man a fish, he will eat for one day. If you teach a man to fish he will eat forever!"

Hmmmmm!

Kill Santa?

This afternoon Blake informed me that he needed to speak with me in "private"! So we went into another room and he very seriously informed me that he thought in order to preserve his brothers' beliefs that Christmas is about the birth of Christ and NOT all about Santa, he thought we should... "metaphorically of course!" KILL SANTA.

To which I replied just as calmly and seriously... "Blake, we are not going to kill Santa."

He said, "OK, I just really wish Nicki Sprecklemieier had not told me the truth in
2nd grade!"

;-(

TOO CUTE!!!

Our newest addition to the family...our niece, Brenna! COULDN'T YOU JUST EAT HER UP?

It is on like Donkey Kong!

Landon has amused himself lately by jumping out from behind everything and scaring Gavin. Gavin cannot see the humor in this fun that Landon is having and after several days of hearing Gavin cry because Landon has scared him yet again, Russ and I decided to give Landon a taste of his own medicine.

Last night after church, I put on a black ninja mask and hid behind Landon's bed in the pitch dark. Russ called Landon upstairs to pick up some clothes in his room. He entered his room, turned on the light and out I popped, roaring as loudly as I could! Needless to say, Landon screamed like a 3 year old little girl and after about 10 seconds of being frozen in place, he took off running down the hallway.

The laughter erupted throughout the house, and we thought that maybe a taste of his own medicine had done him some good.

However, I am afraid that now it is on like Donkey Kong.... I am watching ny back constantly for the next scare!

NORTH

Coming back from North Georgia last weekend we took a "short cut" through the country to try to avoid interstate traffic and cut some time. We went through North, South Carolina, which reminded me of this hilarious video. Russ got to reminisce about his childhood going to the farm for the holidays to visit his Grandma and Papa Temples.

During our looooooong drive through the country, Landon said, "Are we in the middle of nowhere?"

To which Russ replied, "YEP! Ain't it great?

Stronger

I hit the bottom today... God sent me His ladder to help me out of the pit! Always amazed at His wonderful grace, mercy, forgiveness! Thankful that He loves broken people like me!

I will take the candy, but no costume please~

Have you ever met a 2 1/2 year old that HATES costumes? Well, Holden Brown is the first one for me! I have been trying to prepare that child for weeks to get his costume on in preparation for the big candy fest... to no avail! He absolutely HATES costumes. Does he think he will BECOME the character? Is there no turning back, if he puts on the Batman costume, he may have to be Batman Forever. I even tried to get him to simply put on an apron from Home Depot's monthly Saturday kids craft time. Does he believe that we will put him to work at the Depot if he puts on the apron? He would not even wear a HAT!

I tried to get him to carry his Bible around and I was going to put a sign on him proclaiming he was a "Holy Terror"! Second thoughts got the best of me when I thought about making light of him and his bible he so sweetly carries with him all over the place.

Trunk or Treat came and went and he was simply Holden, 2 1/2 year old. I thought for sure when Trick or Treat came around he saw all of the kids dressed up that he would be sure to don one of the 20 something plus costumes in the "costume trunk" - nuh uh!

So, he went around the neighborhood, as himself. The candy concept was a new thing for him too. If you know anything about Holden, he is a candy freak and a sneak. He LOVES candy. So when he realized he could walk up to a door (just like he was) and they would willingly fill a bag with candy... he was determined to hit every house in the neighborhood! ...and we did!

This week, I went into Walmart and with the release of Toy Story 3, they had some PJ's that looked like Woody costumes for $5! $5! They could have had purple dinosaurs on them and $5 would be a great bargain, but they didn't... they looked like a Woody costume. I put in them in the cart and Holden promptly threw them out and started to cry, "I DON"T WANT THAT!"

I guess we can get rid of the boys' costume trunk! Oy!

All I want for Christmas...

A conversation with Gavin this morning...

Me: Gavin what would you like for Christmas this year?

Gavin: Some coloring books, math books (REALLY?), a DS game and a couple of Playmobile people. That is really all Mom. You know, it really doesn't matter how much you get!

WOW! Thank you, Lord, for his sweet little heart!

Isn't he precious...

Tuesday is my day for Ladies Bible Study at church. I drop Gavin off at 9:00 am and my bible study begins at 9:30 am down the hall. I must admit... I was so tired this morning that I could have talked myself into keeping Gavin home from school today and just staying in bed and skipping the study, but I was determined to be obedient today and not let Satan get a foothold and talk me into the "easy way out"!

It began easy enough... got up at 6:45 am to see Blake and Landon off to school, then jumped in the shower. I was up and ready to go by 7:30 am and Gavin was up and ready as well. Holden was still sleeping as 8:30 rolled around, so I let him sleep as late as possible without making us all late and then I went in to get him up and dressed. A chill has spread through Charleston over the last couple of days, so I got him a pair of athletic pants and a long sleeve shirt to put on. Apparently, NOT OKAY! He freaked out when I tried to dress him, a new thing he has started lately. So once I managed to force his clothes on through the kicking and screaming, I buckled him quickly into the car seat... (by the way...not an easy task)! I ran back inside to put Bella in her cage... thankfully, she put herself in before I could even tell her, (anyone who knows what we have been through just to get that crazy dog to go in her cage knows that she must have been beside herself with him as well - and thought she would give me a little help this am)! When I got back to the car... Holden had managed to Houdini his shirt off despite the car seat straps!

I went on to school and figured I would deal with him once we arrived. We arrived... with no shoes... AND NOW no shirt... I tried desperately to get the shirt on him to which he met me with shrill screams of displeasure. By now we were late getting Gavin to school. So, I just picked up my half naked toddler and carried him in to drop Gavin off in his classroom. "yes, I realize he is not fully clothed!" I would say to all who I passed in the hallway who looked at me like I was crazy carrying a kid in on a chilly day half dressed.

Holden and I returned to the car and ultimately ran back home to get shoes, which he promptly removed on our way back to church for my ladies bible study! So, now the task at hand, is to convince Holden that he needs to put his shirt and shoes back on, so that we may go back inside. "NO!" he replies!

"OK, well mommy is going to go inside, would you like to go with me or will you be staying in the car?" I ask him. (I would never leave him alone in the car, this was just a tactic, you probably know that but I feel like I need to make that clear!) After much coaxing, and several minutes, I got him to put his shirt on (the correct way-don't ask) and we started into the building. We made it no further than a few feet outside of the van in the gravel parking lot and he threw himself down onto the ground refusing to go another step... yelling, "NO!"

Lord, certainly you WANT me to go to this ladies bible study, right?

"Don't you want to go inside and play with your friends? Don't you want to go color? Don't you want to go play with play-do?" I say, finding a winner with the play-do question... so up he goes and we are on our way again! But, not for long!...We made it all the way in the door and a few short steps down the hall when once again... "NO!" and he plopped back down on the floor...where he stayed and I walked down the hall a bit and sat down on a window bench to contemplate my next move. As I sat there a sweet older lady (who had witnessed the parking lot tantrum) walked past. She asked me oh so politely, "Is this the best way to deal with him in this situation?" I informed her that I did not know. He was the youngest of four boys and none of the others had ever done this. I also informed her that I did not know what I was going to do next, but at the moment I was just enjoying the peace of no crying and given the previous struggle I had been having with the child, I was just thinking of what I would do next. She very kindly offered me some advice and then said that she was a 1st grade Sunday school teacher but that she had not actually raised any children. However, she would be happy to pick him up and take him to his class. Hmmmm... I think not!

A few more minutes passed, and I stood up, walked down to Holden, picked him up, took him to his class and pushed him into his classroom. I then walked away.

After the bible study when I went to pick him up... the girls just gushed about how sweet and quiet he is and how much they just love him... oh my word!

Unwanted guest!

Fridays are my "free" mornings and at first I was at a loss for what to do, but I have quickly found my way and I use that time to just listen to quietness! I like to go to Barnes and Noble and see what books are out and actually read the back covers to see what they are about... not much time to do that when you go with four boys. So, I was coming back from Barnes and Noble after a nice quiet morning and was on my way to pick up Holden and Gavin from school. At a stoplight I sat just savoring my last few moments of silence and I was running my hand along my neck and chin just kind of daydreaming. A twinge of fear shivered down my body as I discovered something that I had not know was present... a hair! Not just any hair, but a LONG hair. You know the type, the inch and a half long witchy hair! OH MY WORD! What has become of me? How could I not know about this! I tried my best to pull it out with my barbaric fingernails only to make things worse! It curled up like a curling ribbon ... now I had a curly pig tail in my chin! I was becoming frantic! The light would turn green at any moment, I was going to have to walk into school and pick my children up, everyone was sure to see this witchy hair and I was going to be devastated! I could not stop pulling to try to get it out. I imagined myself running into a tree so distracted and desperate to remove this unwanted pest. The cops would come and I would have to have them issue an arrest warrant for all of the so called "friends" who did not love me enough to give a quick heads up on the witch growth coming out of my chin!

I got to the school... still sporting my new curly chin hair... and I had to think fast! So I made sure I had all of my hair down and facing forward so that no one would be able to see it. Now I looked like Cousin IT from the Addams Family... lesser of the two evils at this point! I stopped to talk to NO ONE! Time was of the essence. Get in, get out, get home and remove that hair. I was obsessed, it was all I could think about! Alas, I made it home, and the very first thing I did was rid myself of that unwanted travelling companion! I think from now on, I will take a pair of tweezers with me in my purse for such an emergency as this! ;-)

Counting my blessings...

This week I turned 37 years old... age is nothing but a number, you are only as old as you feel... blah blah blah! UGH! I bet the people who made that up are dead! I am not sure what my hang up about aging is... I am pretty sure it has to do with getting wrinkled up skin and drooping body parts! The boys embrace my anti aging thoughts and all play along with the fact that I am turning 25 EVERY YEAR! We all laugh about it and it is very sweet, but lets face it... I look awful for 25! I should be telling people I am turning 60... I think I would look HOT for 60! It is all in how you sell it! ;-)

The fact of the matter is... I AM 37! I have a wonderful husband who loves me, who respects me, who may not always get it, but he gets what matters! He reminds me that he looks forward to growing old with me and that one day we will have a perfect body with Christ!

I have four beautiful and healthy boys (who are NOT perfect- but then again none of us are) who though they have their moments, they do love me.

I have an amazing mom, who showed me what it was like to sacrifice for and love your children with everything you have.

I have amazing in-laws (which not many people can say) who have taken me in and treated me as their own child.

I have wonderful friends (though some way too far away) who have loved me and become my family despite my many imperfections!

Last, but far from least, I have my Jesus who chose to save me from my sin and make me a child of God! Praising God today for all of my many undeserved blessings!

So, I will thank God for my 37th birthday as well. Every day is a gift from Him and I will rejoice and be glad in it!

DUDE!

Yesterday Blake came home from school and said that his buddy Joshua was wanted to call him in the afternoon to play a game online with Blake. Blake said, "I am going to try and work on my book report diarama this afternoon." So his buddy said, "What if I call you about 7:30?" Blake then replied, "Dude, you must not have ANY family time!"

Question: Who has taken my oldest child and replaced him (if even so shortly) with a duplicate who actually embraces homework and family?

Run, Forest, Run!

Last night was Gavin's first football game, and with a league of 5/6 year olds, you cannot expect too much! That is a good thing, because you don't get much! ha ha
MANY of the kids get the ball, freak out, and run the wrong way! OR... they THINK someone has their flag because there are so many kids around them and they just stop and let the other team take it!

So when Gavin got the ball and was running toward a touch down (apparently very close to the other sideline), all of a sudden... he just stopped running! I am yelling for the entire play, "RUN RUN RUN!!!" When he stops... I continue yelling... "DON'T STOP... KEEP RUNNING! GO GO GO!"

Well,... in the midst of my stupor of trying to convince him to keep going, Russ (his coach) catches my eye (FINALLY) and says... "The play is over, he went out of bounds!") OOOOOOPPPPS!

So I turned to look at the other parents around me cracking up... NICE!

Ummmmm... to my defense, I was trying to detain our crazy Barky Grace... I mean Bella Grace, who was apparently offended by another spectator and decided to demonstrate her sass! At the same time, Holden was wallowing ALL OVER ME ...miserable... suffering extreme exhaustion due to no nap yesterday AND, in between, crying, while performing bouts of the "tippy toe dance" which stands for "I have to poop and don't want to... please don't let it happen"! Blake and Landon are with me, but BOYS and completely oblivious to any needs I may have! Sooooo.... have I defended myself enough? I know very very little about football!... at least I was there to support my Gavin!... RIGHT!?

Happy Birthday to Mrs. Mag...

Blake and I just finished making lemon-lime bars for his teacher. They had to be made BY TOMORROW because it is his last day in class with his awesome teacher Mrs. Mag. Yesterday we found out that the 5th grade at Blake's school has too many students, so a new class was going to be added (after 4 weeks of school). Blake was "randomly" chosen to move to the new classroom/teacher along with a few other kids from his class. (That story is another blog entry).

This is about Blake coming home today and as we were running out the door for Gavin's football game, Blake asked if he could make his teacher some lemon-lime bars for tomorrow. He found out that her birthday is Sunday and he really wanted to make her something special. I guess today the class was discussing the room/teacher changes and Mrs. Mag wanted to do a special treat as kind of a "goodbye" to the kids leaving her. During the discussion Blake mentioned that he would be happy to make something. He picked up on the fact that Mrs. Mag loves lemon bars... so he was on a mission. He would surprise her and take them in for her birthday.

Blake informed the family at dinner that though he was making these lemon bars, they were for his teacher and no one else was to eat them. Then, in the midst of his preparation, he turned to me and said, "You are the only one who may taste them. I want you to test them out! I want them to be perfect for Mrs. Mag!"

Well, the taster says they are PERFECT! She is going to miss out on an amazing young man this year...

In the grand scheme of things...

I wrote a few weeks ago about Zack Mayo that we had been following and praying for... the latest news ...

Wednesday, September 8, 2010 9:41 PM, EDT

Ernie and I met with Dr. Geller this evening. It was not a good meeting. He is very concerned about Zack. His AFP levels are back up. His liver appears to have worsened. He has several nodules in his lungs but they can not be sure what they are without biopsy.

For Zack to be eligible for a transplant he can not have metastasis. He must have a transplant. His liver is that bad.

This has been a very emotional journey and as you can imagine, our emotions tonight are intense.

Dr. Geller has ask us for a couple of days as he meets with the surgeon and radiologists. Then we will regroup to decide the next phase....

We are asking desperately for your continued prayers for our precious Zack.

Please pray specifically that the nodules are not tumors. Pray that he will be eligible for a transplant. Pray that Ernie and I will be strong for him.

This past week we have had so much progress, this news has definitely knocked the wind out of us. Zack has come so far....

Thank you for your prayers.


.........................................................................

How dare I worry about football! In the grand scheme of things... well... Lord, forgive me!

Lord, help me not to come unglued!

So recreational league football is not making Momma happy at this particular time! IN JUST THE PAST 7 DAYS... Blake's team has had practice 6 of those days. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Not only have have they had practice an unreasonable amount of time to be any team but the NFL... Blake's "position" is "substitute". ARE YOU FREAKING KIDDING ME!?

I will be the first to say that Blake is an average player. He is not a stand-out so to speak... but let me repeat myself and say... THIS IS REC LEAGUE FOOTBALL!

Right now, we are watching and waiting, and hoping that our worst fears are not realized and after ALL of this ridiculous practice time, Blake better not be watching the whole game from the bench. You cannot learn to play football by watching the studs play... just like I cannot learn to play tennis by watching Wimbledon!

As I was on my way home tonight, after Holden, Bella and I sat out at the field waiting for 1 1/2 hours as Blake and a few others sat on the sidelines and watched the rest of their team go though plays... I seriously I thought I would have a stroke...I wanted to cuss so bad I felt like I had terrets. I am not trying to be funny by saying that... I was livid! We will see what happens... watching...waiting...praying that it does not turn out like we think it will. Lord, help me not to come unglued!

Not running like crazy!

Gavin was filling us in on how football practice went on Saturday morning. He said that he got the ball and ran as fast as he could. I said, "Ooooohhh, were you running like crazy?"

TO which he replied, "NO, I was running normal!"

Apparently, Russ said several of the kids run the ball the wrong way... not normal.

5 and 6 year olds playing flag football... gotta love it.

Moms know everything... ha ha ha

This morning before school, Gavin was snuggling with me in my bed and Russ called to ask what I was going to do with my "free day". While I was talking to Russ, apparently Gavin pulled the covers over his head and "hid". As soon as I hung up the phone, I hear a little voice saying, "Moooooom, try to find me!"

So I chuckled a little, then my hand under the covers to give Gavin a tickle. He said, "How did you know I was here? Oh, you must have seen my eye peeking out!"

Love that kid!

What to do...

Holden went to school today for his one day a week program. I have to say... I have anxiety! What is wrong with me? I do not know what to do with myself...by myself..alone time...just ME! Who am I? What do I do? Stay busy...sleep...ugh!

I need to get a hold of myself. Get a plan. Figure out who I am without a child attached to my side. LITERALLY! Holden does not sit alone...he is on me every chance he gets.

I realized that Landon must get his inability to be alone from ME... who knew? I guess I do not really like to be alone...what an interesting revelation. Now to find a constructive outlet... hmmmmmm. what to do? what to do?

Change of Heart?

So Landon has had a change of heart regarding the condition of his helmet. On the way to practice he informed me that he has decided he rather likes his scuffed up helmet. It makes him look like he has played hard. According to Landon, that is sure to impress "the Ladies" and they will think he is tough!

He is 8!... Really?

Ode to Bella Grace

ODE TO BELLA GRACE

Oh, Bella Grace, when will you learn
Our trust you may never earn

You insist on chewing up our home
Looking for trouble you like to roam

Does that diaper really taste that good?
As tasty as real food would?

Is it worth it to eat those toys
And terrorize these four Brown boys

Could that trash be so delish
Try your food, it tastes like fish

Whatever you eat, it must go through
It is so sad to see “silly band” poo!

Is it worth it to eat wrappers and all
It must hurt when that foil falls

Your bowl is full when will you see
Eat your food and let all else be

What is the magic age for mom?

This morning as Blake and Landon were getting ready for school, Landon asks: "Mom, at what age do you stop wanting more kids?"

My reply: "Me personally, or people in general?"

Landon: "You personally!"

Me: "Well, Landon, I am pretty sure we are done!"

Landon: "NOOOOOOOOOOO! I want you to have more kids!"

Blake: "No, we are going to adopt!" (Obviously, that must be what he is saving his allowance for... not the PS3, yea, right!)

Me: "Boys, there are no plans for either of those things to happen, so I suggest you talk to God about that."

Who are these kids? Do they realize that I am already practically deaf from the arguing amongst the four of them already? And crazy from the competitiveness of brother versus brother.

As I prayed with the boys on their way out to go to school, Landon adds, "and Lord, please give us another child!"

Shhhh, listen carefully and you may be able to hear the sound of Russ throwing up from anxiety over the very thought!

PS. Still not planning on more kids, don't panic folks!

News Flash

According to Gavin: He holds the world record for the fastest at running across the living room floor and kicking himself up into a headstand position, then holding it the longest.

Two world records. Bet you can't beat that!

Ha ha ha ha

Summer 2010- 2

Click here to view these pictures larger

Fort Sumter

Click here to view these pictures larger

Serving at the Shelter

A couple of weeks ago, the night before our end of the summer beach week, our family served at the homeless shelter. It has been on my heart for some time and I thought that now the kids were a little older it would be a great time to serve Him together. We did get a sitter for Gavin and Holden so that we could give all of our attention to the work. Blake and Landon were a little apprehensive about it and did not want to participate. However, it was very much on Russ and I's heart that we should serve alongside one another WITH them.

The day had come, and I too started to become a little concerned. We explained that these people were homeless and may not have a means to shower and take care of themselves. The boys asked if they would cuss at them... where they got that from, I am unsure, but we told them honestly that we did not know. We told them not to be concerned with what they said to them, just love them anyway. After all, God loves them the same as He does us, and so we should love them as well!

We got to the shelter and started preparing the food that we had taken. There was another family with kids Blake and Landon's age, they were new to Charleston this summer. It was so great to get to talk with them and the kids worked together rolling utensils.

The food was ready to be served and the window panel was raised for the food line to begin. The boys stood in the serving line and greeted the men and listened as most all of them thanked us for the wonderful meal. They were so gracious and appreciative and once everyone was served some came back for 2nds, 3rds, 4ths... ;-)

Once everyone was filled, we shut the kitchen window, and began cleanup. As we left the boys asked how soon we could come back and serve again. Blake said it was not what he expected... (when is anything ever what you expect). I asked him to first tell me about his experience, and then he could tell me how it was different than his expectations. Landon said he was just so in awe of all of the men saying thank you as they came through the line. They both said that they loved serving and they could not wait until we could go back... which is not until October (with our church). I am so thankful for the opportunity to serve alongside of my boys, and I know there are more opportunities out there just waiting for us!

Just thankful!

Today... I just have an overwhelming thankfulness in my heart. I always trust that God is in control, yet I don't always "feel" at peace. At this moment, on this day, tears come to my eyes as I feel a peace and gratitude and a faithfulness that I have been longing to feel once again. Blake and Landon have teachers that they adore... PRAISE GOD! Blake has come home the past two days with joy in his eyes... I have missed that! I know the year has only just begun, but I feel a hope and a thankfulness for what I know is going to be an amazing year ahead! Last year was not without struggles for us all, but He delivered us.

This summer has been so much fun for our family... on the road a lot, beach and lake family fun... but the one thing it took us far away from was our regular church worship. We went when we were in town, but that was not often enough. Through all of the fun, I missed my intimacy with God. Now, though I do not like the homework and the school schedules, I love my time with the Lord and am so looking forward to worship and the beginning of a new year with our small group.

So, today... I am just thankful, for the adjustment period to be behind our family and that the time has come to dig our heels in and take off. I am praying a special prayer for Blake today, I ask that you too will lift him up this week as we are waiting on some information on him. Thankful for my many, many undeserved blessings!

All Grow'd Up... ;-)

Funny Sayings from the first day of school/football for Blake and Landon:

Blake: Well, 3rd graders don't do "this" and 3rd graders don't do "that". 5th Graders get to do "this" AND "that".

Landon: Blake, you just think you are all that now that you are at the top of the food chain!
________________________________________________________________________________________

We picked up football pads and helmets for Blake and Landon on Monday. They are both doing tackle this year, and both are so excited. Apparently, Blake has a tiny head and was unable to be fitted with a helmet on Monday, so we had to go back today because they were supposed to get some more in. SO, we go, and we walk in and there are a ton of NEW helmets. Landon's jaw drops and he immediately states that he wants a new helmet...he says, "they are so CLEAN and SHINY"! I explain to Landon that he has his helmet and we will try to clean it up as best we can. (It is pretty disgusting).

We are walking to the car and as I have to do regularly... I do a kid check... "Do I have everyone, am I missing anything?"

Landon replies "Yep! You are missing my new helmet!"

_________________________________________________________________________________________

When explaining to Blake why he needed a new helmet, Landon says, "There is nothing wrong with being a "Clean-Freak"! Well, not a "freak" but just obsessed with clean!"

Not complaining, just confused...

For as long as I can remember it has been my goal to tell the boys how much I love them. If I asked them today, "Do you know how much I love you?", they would reply, "to infinity and beyond!" So you cna imagine my confusion when over the past few months, Blake has gotten into the "habit" (I say it that way because I do not know what else it could be) of asking me no less than 15 times a day (sometimes 25-30), "Do you love me?"

My reply, "Absolutely!"

Blake counters, "Are you sure?"

"I am positively sure, no doubts, absolutely... I love you forever and beyond even that!" I say.

"Do you REALLY?"

Oh my word! I am thankful that he wants me to tell him, however, I cannot fill him. He is not satiated. That leaves me not knowing how to convince him. Even when he is so angry at me that he cannot even look at me, I will wrap my arms around him and tell him that I know he does not understand, but that I do love him.

So, I asked him this week if he could put his finger on the need that I was not meeting regarding expressing to him convincingly that I do love him and I am sure, and no matter what, I will always love him. He simply said, no, that he knew I loved him, he just wanted to make sure.

Some days, he will come up to me, hug me and not let me go, just squeeze me as hard as he can and just tell me that he loves me so much. Or from across the room, "Mom, I love you so much! I just love you so much!" It sounds sweet doesn't it? Somehow though, there is a deep needy sound behind it that I do not understand. I find myself thinking, if you love me sooooo much, why do you treat me like poo on the bottom of your shoe... disgusted and repulsed with me and the rest of your family most hours of the day?

Help me out here! What is going on? What am I missing? What type of horrible parent am I that no matter how much I express my love to him, it is never enough. Again I am thankful for his expression, many people in this world never express their love to others, I am just wondering what I am doing wrong and how I can help him feel peace.

Answered Prayers? Absolutely!

I was reading the following update for Zack Mayo today. (the 11 year old boy who has cancer previously mentioned in my blog):

{the nurse is starting chemo.pray for me to be strong.Ernie is always strong.Zack is sleeping-has no idea that his body is about to be invaded by toxic drugs.He is so strong& brave.So thankful God has given him to us."For assuredly I say to you,if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain...,'Move from here to there,'and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you"~Matthew 17:20}

I was remembering times in my life when I have held on to this verse. Along with the following verse: Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. Mark 11:24

Obviously, I do not think the "whatever" in this verse means a million dollars or anything. One of the first times I remember so vividly clinging to these verses with the hope of a miracle was when my friend Kristy was pregnant and at 17 weeks, she started leaking amniotic fluid. The doctors told her that her chances of carrying her child to term were very slim. She stayed on bed rest for more weeks than I can remember until her body became toxic, they had to take the baby and fight to save her life. That whole time, I remembered praying without ceasing unlike any praying I had ever done before. I had scenarios in my head about how God could be glorified by that child making it against all the odds and what a testimony my sweet friend Kristy would have. Against all odds miracle baby that would give God all the glory. That is not the way God planned it though. God took that little baby boy home, and I was angry! Why? What kind of testimony was that for His glory? Didn't the bible say that "whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours" (Mark 11:24). Did we not believe enough? Did we not have enough faith?

Fast forward a couple of years, I had found out that I was pregnant. After a couple of months, we shared the news with our family, then a week or two later, the doctor told me that my baby had died, that it no longer had a heartbeat. I was asked if I wanted to have a DNC. Absolutely not, was my reply. My baby could not possibly be gone, maybe it was just too soon to see the heartbeat. I held on with every bit of faith and belief in my soul that my God was mighty, and he performed miracles. However, once again, God said no. Sadly, after our Gavin was born, this happened one more time to us, and again, God said no.

How was God glorified? Honestly, I do not know. One day I will have to ask Him. I do know that God allowed me to walk in that pain and suffering, never leaving nor forsaking me despite my crying out in anger and sadness. He brought me through it, and has made me a person who can minister to others who have and will go through a similar situation. I also know, that my prayer life had increased exponentially. Maybe that was how God was glorified, again, I do not know.

For today, I will pray with the Mayo family, and rejoice in the faith that they have... no matter how God answers their prayers, He is with them and will walk with them through it all, in that I have faith! I will thank God for delivering me through painful times in my life, and look forward to meeting two additional beautiful children in Heaven.

Let's Go Crazy

I was flipping through the channels and passed over '19 Kids and Counting' with the Duggar family. pffft! She has 19 CHILDREN! I have 4! She seems to have all of this order and organization, and the ability to sit and sing 'Kumbaya' at the end of the day. I cannot even get my boys to flush the toilet, much less act like the Sound of Music's VonTrapp Family! What the hay-ho? (TO take some slang from Blake!) I am lucky to have all of my hair left by the end of most days! If I am singing anything it's "Let's Go Crazy"! A "reality" show about a family that cannot possibly be realistic... WHY WOULD I WANT TO WATCH THAT? All that will do is make me feel like a loser mom and even more out of control! SKIP!

Exit Soapbox...

If only I was on Fantasy Island

One of the latest tasty treats cooked up by Blake THIS week, was Fantasy Fudge! I am quite sure the angels in Heaven were singing an Halleluia song as that was setting! The fudge is, of course, A-Ma-Zing! However, it is not the only Fantasy going on in this house! I am living in the fantasy that this fudge is a "free food" so to speak. You know, calorie free. As much as I have dipped into this fudge, I am living the fantasy that it is NOT jumping onto my thights and fanny and hanging on for dear life. Reality check! It is going straight to the booty...each and every bite!

On a better note, Blake did wake up during the breakfast hours today and make breakfast for everyone. Well, since this is his first time, I did a little more than I was hoping, but the good news is, next time he has a good idea how to go it alone.

SO, for now, I am going back to my Fantasy Land, and I am going to have a "free" piece of fudge, and fantasize about the day that maybe, just maybe, I could get help with DINNER... maybe just 1-2 days a week? Ahhhhhh!

Hyper-chondriac? sp?

It is 12:00 p.m. and Blake has stumbled from his room in a groggy stupor after sleeping the entire morning away. In his defense, he did attend a sleepover Saturday night and as I understand it, did do much sleeping! WHich begs the next question... why do kids go to "sleepovers" and refuse to sleep. It is as if someone is whispering in their ear, "as soon as you go to sleep, you have given up all opportunity for fun forever!" (Doggone voices!) But, I digress!

As I am sitting on the couch for a moment trying to just finish the last few pages of my book Blake plops down on the arm of the sofa...

Blake: Mom, have you checked me for Cancer?

REALLY? But I calmly say, "What are you talking about?"

Blake: Are you 100 percent positive that I do not have cancer? When I was born did they make sure that I did not have cancer?

Oh my word! It makes me so sad that he would have this fear at 10 years old, yet I am not surprised because he is a bit dramatic and hyperchondriac-ish! However, I believe that this concern is stemming from a young boy who is 11 years old named Zack Mayo. We do not know Zack, but he is from my hometown of Wilmington and we have been prayerfully following this sweet boys journey through the unknown. Here is his story:

On Wednesday, June 9, 2010, our perfect world turned upside down.Our 11 yr old- Zack had just graduated 5th grade the day before & we were looking forward to a fun summer break. I left the house at 5am to meet my friend Tracey at Wrightsville Beach for exercise down the beach & to watch the sunrise. I left everyone sleeping in the house.I returned @7am with breakfast for everyone.My boys, Zack&Nick were up&running around.My husband Ernie had coffee ready for us to enjoy on the screened porch.It was a beautiful morning! After breakfast our boys got in the pool.Ernie had to leave for work but said take a picture of them enjoying the pool....I hate to leave he sd. I did snap a great pic of them enjoying their first day of summer break. Brothers having fun! They got out because Jake, one of Zack's friends, called to see if he wanted to go with them to pick berries. Around 10am, he said I'm going outside to ride my scooter until they get here. He came in just a few minutes later telling me he had fallen on his scooter. He said he fell on the concrete. His elbows were skinned & he had a goose egg on his head with a few other scrapes but did not appear to be anything serious. I got ice & told him I think I'll take you to the dr just to get your head checked - just because I'm one of those moms who always get head bumps checked. Called my husband to tell him&my neighbor to see if she could watch my little guy. Meanwhile, his friend&mom arrived and said they thought he looked ok but it was a good idea to get him checked. My neighbor came in and I said his color does not look good, I'm taking him now. We got him up&he passed out briefly. I immediately called 911. By the time my husband&EMT arrived he was very white, his lips were blue and he was cold. He was still conscious. They treated him as a concusion&reassured me that disorientation etc was typical with that. He was rushed to New Hanover Regional Medical Center with me in the rescue squad talking to him as they said to keep talking. The last thing he said to me was "mommy stop talking" - which is so typical of my sweet Zack. We were greeted at the ER by about 10 people&they said we have to intibate him&sedate him immediately so he won't fight us. I agreed. My husband joined me in the ER&within 10 minutes our son was in cardiac arrest. I'm not certain how much time passed as we collasped to the floor of the ER, thinking our son was dead - devasted, sobbing, crying out to God, confused about what has happened when we hear a cheer&the nurse tells us they have cardiac activity! We are informed he has internal bleeding in his abdomen&he is rushed to surgery. Within hours, we discover he has a tumor on his liver (that we knew nothing about) that ruptured&he literally bled to death. Two surgeries&a stint through his groin, they are still having difficulty controlling the bleeding&keeping his blood pressure up. The decision is made on Thursday to move him to Chapel Hill. A helicopter is scheduled to transport him but there are storms in the area so a critical care unit is sent to pick him up by ambulance. Two of my good friends stay with Zack while we rush home to pack a few things. At this point, Zack is still responsive with eye blinking&hand squeezing on command.I remember walking around my bedroom in circles not really knowing what I was putting in the suitcase-almost like a dream.We return hospital to about 50 of our friends &family who are there to see him and us off. We leave about 20 minutes ahead of the ambulance.Ernie's sister &mom follow us, my parents stay behind to care for our younger son, Nick.The ambulance catches up&passes us very quickly on I40West.The 2+ hour trip takes us an eternity. We arrive at the hospital&they immediately take us into a little room.A doctor, first name Ben, comes in - says surprised our son survived trip but when he arrived asked Zack to squeeze his hand&he was amazed at his strength.Zack was losing a lot of blood as they struggle to keep up. A surgeron joins us to tell us that he can not go in from the top (abdomen) because he is afraid it will be a waterfall that he can not stop.The radiologist will have to go in with another stint through the groin to see if they can find the bleeding liver to stop it.The chances of his survival at this point, they tell us is slim.My husband&I spend the next few hours on our knees praying.I post on my facebook page &get others praying. They stinted artery in liver pumping blood out &now we are Pediactric ICU with another successful surgery behind us but in very critical condition - a coma with brain swelling,ventilator, kidney dialysis and open abdomen.God is answering prayers everyday. Follow along with us & praise God for the miracles as we climb this mountain with our son.

Zack is now in Cincinnati at the Children's Hospital where his next phase of treatment is set to begin. If you would like to join us in praying for him, she updates regularly at http://www.caringbridge.org/visit/wendymayo/mystory


This could be any of our children... one day they are fine and the next everything changes. Blake has been hearing about Zack and I am sure can relate with this young boy. It breaks my heart that he would be worried that this could be him, but the fact of the matter is that it could be any of us! I am thankful for this day because it is truly a gift from God. We do not know our future or how many days we have on this earth. So I rejoice in THIS day! Tomorrow is a new day, potential gift, and I will rejoice in it if it is given to me!

Hip Hop Hustle... Holla

My mom sent me an awesome workout DVD this week called 'Hip Hop Hustle'. It is definitely "blog worthy"! Let me say, that the beginning words were enough to make me almost double over in laughter, which already I am on the right track for an abdominal workout with that move alone! ;-) The first words were instructions on what your workout wear SHOULD be... baggy pants, baggy tee and of course, your best hip hop HAT (preferrably positioned to one side, Play-ah!)

SO, did I wear the correct work out clothes to start off my work out, you ask... you will continue to wonder... YO!

The boys were in the livingroom with me as I started the DVD and already I could tell by the big eyed stares that they were a little concerned. It did not take long until Landon quite flustered said, "Mom, this is very inappropriate!" Again, ab workout move as I cracked up laughing and turned paused the DVD. I guess I will need to wait until I am alone to try to finish the workout, or start stashing away money for therapy for my boys! Still laughing!...

Angel Song

I just completed my latest book from www.booksneeze.com called Angel Song. My opinion on the book is a little conflicted. The book was good, yet it left me wanting more. I was very excited to start this book as I thought the idea was very good. Following the death of her sister, a woman starts hearing unexplainable music. Of course, she thinks that she is going crazy from the loss of her last living relative. As she is going through the process of getting her sister’s house ready to sell after her death, her sister’s neighbors surround her and show her love and acceptance like she has never felt, including a little boy with Down Syndrome. He claims that there are angels with her, watching over her and protecting her, and the music she hears is angels. Being a non-Christian, she does not believe that God is real, much less angels. If they were why wouldn’t they protect her, why wouldn’t God protect her sister from dying? After all, her sister WAS a Christian.
She experiences much inner conflict regarding abandonment and feeling she does not deserve to be loved. Her sister’s friends love her unconditionally and in her brokenness, just as Christ loves us…
You can probably guess how the book ends, and I do like that about the book, reading about how someone comes to realize that Christ does love us and gave His life for us, there is nothing bad about that, however, I would have liked a little more depth to the characters AND the story. It continues on about her job, and her shutting everyone out, to the last chapter where all of a sudden she believes the angels and God are real and now she can date the neighbor. I think the emotion was lacking for me for some reason that I cannot put my finger on. That is what frustrated me about the book, it was a good premise, but something was just missing for me.
Would I recommend this book to others? Hmmm…. Yes, because it was not a waste of time, and the story idea was good. I love reading about how God reveals Himself in different ways. However, I would probably only give it 3 out of 5 stars.

Vet Slap... coming right at ya~

A couple of weeks ago when the boys and I had taken Bella to the vet, the Dr. Vet-Man said that it would be a good idea to run Bella more. He asked which one of the boys was brave enough to ride their bike around the block holding her leash while she ran beside. Oh, at that moment, both puffed up older boys were certainly brave enough and absolutely looking forward to doing just that! Before they had the "opportunity", Bella had her spaying surgery, so she was unable to do too much for a week or so (at least she was not supposed to).

Russ and Blake were going to mow the yard last night after the heat subsided some, so they headed out around 8 pm (still 900 degrees), and I headed outside with Bella. I thought I would try the bike/block/Bella idea and give her a good run! I started down the driveway holding onto Bella's leash, and my eyeballs must have been as big as saucers due to the fear I was experiencing! That crazy dog was all over the place and therefore SO WAS I! I felt like an out of control weeble wobble. As CRAZY BELLA zig zagged back and forth in front of me, I used the hand breaks to try to keep myself from being launched 40 miles an hour into a tree or mailbox. Landon is screaming out after me, "Mom, do you have your cell phone in case you run Bella over?" Russ is saying to Landon, "Run Bella over, what about Mom? Do you see what is happening to HER?"

We got about 4 houses down, I was still technically on the bike, my legs were flailing alongside of me as I tried to steady myself...or at least that was the idea... the fear had only intensified, when at that moment I thought... What in the world was that vet thinking when he suggested that this was a good idea... TO MY 10 and 8 YEAR OLD BOYS! I wanted to slap that man!

I managed to get Bella to turn around and head back home. As we pulled back up in the driveway I informed Russ that that was NOT going to happen! I will be sure to thank the vet next time I see him!

Fantastic Chicken?...Why Yes it is!

Russ' Aunt Sue had made us dinner one night when we were in North Georgia about a year ago, and it was so delicious. I could not leave without the recipe. For whatever reason, I did not make it myself until last night, and we ALL agreed... IT WAS FANTASTIC!!! SO, I thought I would share the recipe because not only is it yummy, it is sooooo easy!

Fantastic Chicken

Prep Time: 5 min.
Cook Time: 2 hours
Cook Temp: 300

8 boneless skinless chicken breasts
8 slices of bacon
1 package dried beef (cut up)
1 can Cream of Mushroom
1/2 pint Sour Cream

In a 9 x 13 casserole dish, place cut dried beef. Wrap each chicken breast with bacon and place on top. In a bowl, mix sour cream and soup then spread evenly over chicken breasts. Bake for 2 hours. Serve over rice. (You may use the crock pot instead).

Yummy!

Cooking Class Part 2

Notable quotes-

Blake - "Landon, you do not have time for Legos! You need to concentrate on the timer!"

Blake - "Landon, don't be afraid to use a little power in cracking those eggs!"

Blake - "Landon, the cook may not lick his fingers while he is cooking. If you do, you MUST wash your hands before continuing!" (I do appreciate his obsessive hand cleaning!)

Blake - "Landon, I am not going to help you clean up your mess, because I am about to make my own that I am going to have to clean up!" (at least he understands the rules!)

Current Items being made:

Chocolate Chunk Cookies
Fudgy Brownies
Lemon Lime Bars

Seriously? Weight Watchers does NOT agree! Come on, Kids, how about some Japanese food? Let's try cooking DINNER instead of DESSERT! ;-)

THOUGHT: I think tomorrows class should be Cleaning 101!

Cooking Class

Shockingly, Blake is PATIENTLY TEACHING Landon to make chocolate chip cookies. For anyone who knows Blake, you would understand why this is shocking! #1 - Blake does not help Landon do ANYTHING! #2 - Blake is not patient with ANYONE! Thank you, Lord, for a minor miracle today!

Thanks for the guitar, GRAM!!!!!

Mom and Tim 2010 Summer

Click here to view these pictures larger

Angel no more...

I have always felt like God blessed me with four wonderful, for the most part well-behaved boys. Holden was the best baby, and I always said that if I had him first I would have had plenty more... well, I didn't, yet I still did. Anywhooo... as I said, he has always been a really good baby, easy going, sweet, loving, loves his brothers...you get the picture.

Well, my "Sweet Baby Boy" has hightailed it out of here, and has been replaced by "Dear God, nail everything down, and duck tape that kid - Boy". Terrible twos have swept in with a vengeance! He's CRAZY! I am sure he is just trying to exist with the four older brothers leading the way, however, they are pretty good to him, I must say!

I had to go by the library today and return some books and pick up some new ones. Well, mistake number one, Russ was not going with us. So, Holden asked for "Daddy, Daddy, Where's Daddy? Daddy... Daaaadddddyyyy!" I told Holden that we would go into the library and then home to daddy. "Hmmmpppht!" was his reply! I should have turned around at that moment and just used the drop box! How important is it for my kids to read during the summer anyway? But, no... we went forth with the plan.


Blake decided that today was the day he needed to get his own library card... tick, tock, tick, tock... that would be the sound of the ticking time bomb waiting to go off (aka Holden). Counter Lady says, "Ma'am, Did you know you had an expired license? You know you could get a fine for that?" AWESOME! Once we had the card in hand, Holden promptly threw his shoes on the floor and looked at me with such defiance in his eyes. I explained that he must put his shoes on, and he looked at me and walked away. My head was telling me all sorts of things to do... but due to the very crowded location we were in, I grabbed his hand and tried to walk him over to the books so that I could grab a few for the boys in my haste and get out of there. Not so fast... rent-a-cop security guard very disgusted with my parenting at that moment said, "YOU HAVE TO WEAR SHOES IN HERE!" So, again, the battle ensued. I sat him in the closest chair, and told him that we would not be leaving until he put his shoes on. Apparently, that was ok with him as he sat down and looked at me and smiled. Great... so now what? Then I remembered, Russ was home waiting for us.

"Holden, don't you want to go home and see Daddy?" ... The shoes went on!

So, we are racing to find the books that Landon had requested, Blake is looking for a certain book, I look over at Holden who is now scaling the book shelf... Spiderman was halfway to the top when I saw him and I almost immediately had a stroke! I grabbed him, and told Blake that we were DONE!

At the check out desk Holden is trying to take the books off of the closest shelf, so, I try to deter him by picking him up so that he cannot reach... at which time he starts to scream at the top of his lungs. I did not think I would make it out of the library without me having a nervous breakdown... but low and behold I did. The total visit only lasted about 15 minutes from start to finish, but that was THE LONGEST 15 minutes I have experienced in quite some time. "Barefoot Horror Movie Screaming Spiderman" stressed me out to the max! The sad part about it, was that I only had Blake and Holden with me, I cannot imagine how much worse it could have been with 2 more added to the mix.

I am already missing my sweet little Holden...

Bringing Brenna home~ ;-)

Praising God today for His many blessings.

Email Update from AMY:

Hello, everyone! We are writing with great news, having already been to the oath ceremony and have Brenna's visa in hand!!! This morning the consulate called us to tell us that they had great news--the encrypted files were finally unlocked overnight--in fact, someone who wasn't officially assigned to our case worked on it 'til 2/3 in the morning US time last night. God is so good and moved in the hearts of MANY to get our paperwork done!! Today we went to the Consulate for the ceremony where we met the director of adoption dept and found out more. She recognized Brenna just from me holding her! She said she'd been drawn to our case b/c of a friend of hers who'd adopted 5 years ago and had a similar experience with expecting a healthy baby and finding a sick child. She said untold numbers worked to help and that it was amazing how fast everything was done. For the oath ceremony, we joined about 30 other families in pledging our love and care for Brenna; we all cried of course! Our sweet girl celebrated by cooing and staring in my eyes for the whole bus ride back to the hotel and by giving us her first real giggles tonight from daddy being silly. So awesome! We are in love! We stare at our two children and wonder why we are so blessed.

I can never express on behalf of our family how much your prayers, emails, concern, love, etc, have meant to us. You have been J's hands and feet across the ocean! Please pray us home--here are specifics:
1. for us all to be seated in bulkhead together with a bassinet for Brenna
2. for the cyclone coming to HK not to affect our flight Friday
3. for Brenna's fever to break and not return the whole flight home; she has a seemingly chronic fever right now. Please pray against any diarrea, too and for her ot be at peace

We leave Guangzhou tomorrow at 2 for Hong Kong. Our flight leaves Fri morning and we get into B'ham at 8pm central time. Can't wait to see and catch up with everyone!!

Love, love,
Amy
Praise to the Lord, who is mighty to save! He is everlasting Father, Prince of peace, wonderful counselor, mighty in battle, intimate in His care and compassion.

Update

Dear All,
After a nice, somewhat relaxing weekend, we got some disappointing news today. It looks like there's a good possibility we'll be staying here longer than anticipated. The US Consulate doesn't have the power to process our change of status without CIS (immigration) processing our home study update (yes, another one...). We have spoken with everyone we can at this point. Here's what we need you to pray and get the troops praying ,too:
That when our agency talks to CIS today or NBC (national benefits something), that they would find favor and they would agree to process our update with GREAT speed--like by tomorrow. Pray for everything to be processed as quickly as possible. The big thing we're asking, that we KNOW God can do, is to get us out of here on our original date--Friday. This would be a mini-miracle....

If we have to stay, we're in a great place to do so, I suppose. Please know we are strengthened and encourage by your prayers. We know God is upholding each of us.

Brenna seems to be gaining strength and relaxing more each day. Please continue to pray especially for her fever to go away and no diarhea (sp?).

Please know that if this e-mail is disjointed and incoherent it is because I (Chris) took over after Brenna started crying. (Crying is good...this is an expression of emotions and a belief that her needs may be met).


Love you all!

Chris, Amy, Micah, and Brenna


Amy here back on...
Just thought I'd add that we love hearing from you--emails help so much even though we don't have time to respond to them. It's quite hard for my personality to be so out of touch! thank you all for your messages so far--hope you're all doing well!!

ONe really hard thing today was seeing pics from Brenna's orphanage. We sent a disposable camera there before we came with a translated letter asking for them to take pics. This is a huge blessing that they took some b/c we couldnt' go to her orphanage this week b/c it was a day she was so sick. Anyway, they are quite overwhelming...it looks like a hard orph and she is terrified and terrible looking in all of them. Please pray for us to know how to process this. We are thankful for having them, but they are so hard to see. We feel that we are seeing a truer picture than most do these days of what the reality is across Ch with orphs. Pray we are up to the task of knowing what to do with this knowledge. Pray for the orphans here--for people to rise up within the country to care for them.

What makes a person special to me?

Well, there are many things that make me appreciate others, but this past weekend, I was reminded of one big thing. When someone invests in my children, not because they HAVE to, but just because they want to... that warms my heart. This past weekend, Russ' cousin Joe took to my boys and helped teach them to fish for Catfish at the lake. Blake and Landon had the time of their life. After fishing most of the day on Saturday, he took them back out at 6:30 in the morning on Sunday before we left the lake to come home from the reunion. He was so patient with them, and uplifting and he made memories with...and for them that they will not soon forget. I am thankful for those, like Joe, that invest in my boys.

Temples Family Reunion

Click here to view these pictures larger

Gavin turns 5

Click here to view these pictures larger

AMY EMAIL

Dear Friends and Family,
Well, if you've been looking for some good news, you're going to get it. We made it through a scary night to see God's hope shine today. Brenna was quite sick last night and we had some fears that she could develop a dangerous syndrome due to an increase in her food intake after starving for so long. But mid-day today she started having relief from her fever and we've seen her personality start to shine. We have one more day of this critical time for potential refeeding syndrome and we'll slowly be able to increase her food intake more. I cannot explain how overwhelming and scary the last few days have been--essentially we've been caring for our child who would be in the hospital in the US under close supervision. So bizarre...but this level of malnutrition is not an uncommon thing here--just uncommon in these days of Ch int'l adoption...

She has really been funny today--kicking her legs, squealing, holding toys, trying to pull up... it's been so hard not to feed her more than we have been advised b/c she's so hungry!! Soon, baby girl, you can have all the food ou want!

So here's the kicker/the curveball from today....we went to the Chinese physical exam office where all adoptive families must have their children exaimined before the final adoption ceremony/visa stuff. They were totally overwhelmed at her state. They are now refusing to allow her to be classified as a healthy adoption...so they are requiring our status to be changed to special needs adoption. We have no idea what this really means at this point as far as paperwork adn timeline goes...my heart sank for about 1 minute when we heard this but then i thought, of course, the battle for her continues and we are up for the challenge through Christ who gives us strength. PLEASE pray for favor with the US consulate--to not require too much change (we're non-hague family which makes it easier) and to see that we need to get her home ASAP. Please pray for contd wisdom and peace as we care for her. Please pray for us all as we're so exhausted in every way. Pray for Micah--he's got a runny nose but no fever.

I have to end with a story of what God led us through today. This morning was NOT easy--we had great concern for her and came to a place where we felt God ask us to be okay with the thought that she may not make it--that our time with her may be very short. Somehow, God gave us the peace to do this--I don't know how, but He did. We felt Him ask us just to love her and to realize 1 Cor 13:12--that what we see is just a glimpse. We were very aware of every moment with her, taking pictures, loving her. Then, hope rose up! Funny how this mornng our group was focused on words of hope from Him... Seeing her blossom today has been a true miracle. She's not out of the woods, but she's one day stronger!!! I cannot wait for you all to meet her, God willing, and to see the amazing girl she becomes!!

Love to all,
Amy

PS, on a hilarious side note: we get these specal barbie dolls holding a chinese baby at the hotel as gifts!! We have two--I think Mariah Carey is the image they try to create with the mom barbie's hair and clothes--so funny!!

Keep Praying!

Today, Thurs., has been a better day. We had to have Brenna's picture made
today and her physical. The physical was done by Chinese drs. for the American
consulate. Three drs. came to see her and they were appalled by her condition.

She has gained 7 oz. in 2 days!!!!! She is trying to sit up and is playing.
She smiles and makes noises. She recognizes her Mama and Daddy. She is crying
for her demands to be met. We're so excited. She has no fever today. She
likes to pull Chris' glasses off. She tucks her bib under her chin when she's
going to be fed. She wants a piece of paper or a towel to tuck and throw
around. We're amazed and so thankful for this improvement. The drs. will not
approve her for a normal child adoption. Her paper work has to be c hanged to
special needs adoption before we can get clearance. Why, we don't know.
Dillion the adoption agencys in the states h as to write the consulate and clear

this up. We're on hold right now. The pediatrician in AL wants her home as
soon as possible. We may be able to leave a day early by not going back tgo
Hong Kong. Her dr. in AL said if she had her now she would be in the hospital.

Micah is a little trooper. He is ready to come home. He helps feed his baby
sister and wants to play with her. Continue your prayers. God is listening.
Linda, your email address will not go through.


Much love,
Jana

Latest on Brenna

EMAIL FROM RUSS' DAD:

Brenna ran a high fever last night. She is not out of the woods yet. She is playing but Amy and Chris did not get to visit the orphanage yesterday. She continues to take her food, but she is on a rocky road to recovery.

Please pray for Brenna's continued recovery and healing from whatever malady she suffers. Pray for her little body to intake the nutrients she requires to overcome her malnutrition - she continues to take food well. Pray for wisdom and guidiance for Amy and Chris - that they receive the right counsel and can bring Brenna to Birmingham with them permanently. Pray for Micah that he can learn to share his parents with his new "sister."

Thanks to each of you for your prayers and for your support during these times.

The Same Kind of Different as Me

I recently read the book 'The Same Kind of Different as Me'. I received it free through www.booksneeze.com with the only deal being that I would write a review about it on my blog. Let me tell you... deal or no deal, that book was amazing. It is a true story and fiction could not be written any more addictive. This book shook me to the core. I received it yesterday afternoon and used every free moment to read until I was finished today! I laughed, I sobbed... I learned!

First of all, the sadness and oppression of blacks in America at times in our history was eye opening. I am not ignorant that slavery existed, however, it was long before my time and nothing that I have seen personally. Out of sight, out of mind so to speak. I have never read about it in a first person perspective, until now. It disgusted me! In God's eyes, we are all the same, sadly that is not how it has been on Earth.

The story of Ron and Debbie was such a blessing to read. Debbie truly was a woman seeking to serve God. What a beautiful example of the virtuous wife! Her blindness to those "unlike" herself was so admirable and I only wish that more of us had that same compassion, myself included!

Without giving the whole story away, I would just say that this book is such a testimony of God having a plan for every one of us! He uses ALL things for His glory and though we may not understand the "why's", it is all part of His plan. This book is powerful... filled with the power of compassion, overwhelming with the example of faithfulness, and powerfully motivating to make a difference.

Update

Hey,

Wanted to let you knnow about today. Amy, Chris, and Brenna were at the dr. most of the day. They were able to go to an international clinic and see an Eng. speaking dr. We're all very hopeful of his info. He examined Brenna throughly which was not done yesterday. She is normal in length and he does not think she has any lasting developmental problems. She has great eye contact. He says says she does not have a twisted stomaach. He belives she has an underlying condition that has not b een diagnosed. Her picture that we got today from when she was about 3 weeks old showed a fat little girl. She is running a fever and the dr. believes she has a colon infection. We have med. for both. She is eating and drinking like crazy. He said feed her on demand. She is turning over, and we say her first smile this evening. Amy is so good with her and she watches her Mama's every move. The dr. mentioned maybe Chron's or colitis. We'll get the tests at home. We would like to come home early but we think we need the time here to buid her up. Amy and Chris signed the adoption papers today and paid the orphanage. She said they were counceled by so many today and many more people were involved. One of the adoption agents said Amy and Chris were approved for a healthy baby, and might not be given the right to keep Brenna. Please continue to lift us all up in your prayers. We're all tired and concerned, but so much better today. Micah is super. He is having a little trouble sharing Amy. Brenda and I kept him today while they were gone. Please pray that Brenna gets to stay with us. She would not have lived long if we hadn't gotten her. I have lots more to tell, but I know I'm rambling,. Gotta get somoe sleep.

Love,
Jana

Update from Amy

Dear Family and Friends,
I know that you have been eagerly awaiting news on our first meeting with our daughter yesterday. Believe me, no one could have been more shocked than me over how differently yesterday went than we'd imagined. Let me just say that our trip over here could not have gone more smoothly--Micah is a champion traveler! Yesterday we went to meet our daughter at the local provisional adoption agency office. When she was given to us, we knew that something was wrong. She is very, very sick. She's 18 months but the size of a 6 month old--we knew this but it's impossible to be prepared for that. Then, just 10 minutes after having held her, they (her nurse and caregiver at her orphanage) gave us some medical paperwork; she had just gotten out of a week's stay at a hospital on Friday. She was admitted for terrible diarrhea (sp?) and we got a strange translated hard to understand diagnosis of a twisted stomach. So, we demanded that we be taken with her to a foreign clinic in the city for medical attention. Micah, by the way, was so excited to meet her and kissed her spontaneously!! so sweet!
So, we spent 4 hours at this clinic and didn't get much info; they did an ultrasound and said that her connection b/tn her stomach and duodenum is normal, but said they couldn't tell about her stomach even t hough our american pediatrician at the int'l adop clinic told us an american doc could diagnos this by ultrasound...So then they said a GI would be needed to tell. Well, we kept asking how she got this diagnosis from the other hospital--the nurse finally called and sure enough shed' gotten one there. We were trying so hard not to put her through anything she didnt' need--she was SOOOO scared at the clinic--she knew wher she was... Anyway, the pics from that GI should arrive by mail today and we'll go from there. We've asked for an extension on our adoptio paperwork b/c our guide said basically the only card we have in getting info on her is our money and we still have it in OUR pockets for now...
So, she came home with us last night and she's definitely a fighter. She seemed very attached to her nurse and was upset when she left...so she wasn't happy with us until we gave her food...she can suck down a bottel like you've never seen!! She also loves rice porridge and ate some last night. She sucks on her ring finger of her right hand to go to sleep and slept with us last night.

I don't think it's possible to explain how bad she looks--so malnourished...it's overwhelming. We feel at this point that ther is some underlying problem causing chronic diarreha or something...we just don't know!!

PLEASE pray for us: 1. For information--we want ALL of her records from the hospital and orphanage. They are NOT forthcoming with any of this. we don't know if someone is trying to save her life and so are scard to give it or what... but we need that info 3) for complete unity b/tn Chris and I as we confirm our decision. 4) for wisdom on whether or not to push for an expidited leave from the country or if she needs the time here to recoup befor our trip. (5) for Micah's and all of our health from being in a clinic yesterday (6) for Brenna not to be afraid (6) for our guide, Becky, to be able to communicate with us and the doctors and orphanage (7) for peace and clarity adn rest. (8) most of all, for complete healing for our daughter.

Please get people praying for us. We believe that satan does not want her redeemed. pray we are not acting on fear. Pray for rest and calm We are all having trouble sleeping except for Micah. Yesterday was the most surreal and overwhelming day of my entire life. Once again the Holy spirit reminded me of a dream when i asked Him to remind me of what I needed to know--God is faithful. Pray we can deal with our emotions as we have them or need to...

Love to all...
Amy

Pulling the Wool?

We heard from China this morning... apparently, the adoption agency failed to mention that Brenna has been in the hospital for the past week. They discovered that she has an inverted stomach. This can be repaired with surgery...however, there are some other concerns. She is 18 months old, and she is only drinking milk and eating rice puffs. Her weight is about 12-14 pounds. This child was not listed as special needs, as this was something that Amy and Chris carefully considered being that Amy suffers from Crohn's Disease and they thought it would be very difficult to provide the necessary care to a special needs child. So the question remains...how could this agency be aware of her hospitalization and medical needs and not inform Amy and Chris. Understandably, they are torn apart right now, as they watch other families along their journey who are adopting their children and going home to start their bonding lives as a new family. They wonder what the future holds for their sick little Brenna.

As they are in China, they are consulting with doctors from Birmingham for recommendations and information. Please join us in praying with them!

Adding On

We are waiting to hear from Amy and Chris regarding meeting their precious daughter, Brenna, for the first time. It is 8:53 p.m., on July 4th, in Fort Oglethorpe, GA, where we are hanging out with Russ' dad. Jana, Russ' mom, is with Amy and Chris (and their 2 year old son, Micah, in China, and it is 8:53 a.m. on July 5th there. Today is the day. We are praying with them, and so excited for them. Please pray with us for a smooth adoption and blessed union between them all. We are looking forward to meeting our sweet little neice very soon!

Pictures from Holly

Click here to view these pictures larger

Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on!...

We had a great week in South Florida, staying at the beach and visiting friends and "family"... yet, it is a bitter reminder that life goes on without us. Russ and I had many conversations over the course of the week... could we move back, would we want to move back, what would we do if we moved back, and how different our lives would be if we did. Yet, since we have not "found our niche" so to speak in Charleston, it makes it even more difficult to experience the loss. Where DO we go from here?

Russ asked me this week, if I could live anywhere, where would that be... honestly, I have NO IDEA! There is no perfect place this side of Heaven. The fact of the matter is, we have to move AT LEAST once more before retirement from the Coast Guard. I am getting too old for this. The starting over, planting temporary roots... ugh! I feel as if our life is being measured in time... how many years is this tour, how many years is the next tour and where on earth will it be, how many years left until we can make our own decisions about where we live... yet at the end of all of the day, I know it is the best decision for our family to finish the ride.

It just reminds me of the song... Ob-la-di, ob-la-da, life goes on!...

A Walk to Remember...though I wish I could forget it!

Two nights ago, we went on a family walk/bike ride after dinner. Gavin just learned to ride his bike without training wheels and so he LOVES LOVES LOVES to ride his bike now. He was the one who begged to do our nightly trip around the block, Gavin's second time on his bike. Russ was pulling Holden in the wagon, I was walking Bella, and the Landon and Gavin were riding their bikes. (Blake stayed home doing his new favorite thing... baking cookies.)

Generally, I keep Bella on a very short tight leash because she is CRAZY! She could pull a covered wagon with her freakish strength... but I digress. We have lots of dogs in our neighborhood and they either have no fences containing them, or they have invisible fences... either way... we have no idea whether they can come out of their yards or not. However, Bella has been doing much better on our walks so I had given her a little freedom on the leash to roam more. We got partially around the neighborhood when a little white dog came barrelling from his house after our little Bella. Bella freaked out and took off across the street toward the dog, and at this same time, Gavin was pedalling his heart out back toward us. Russ and I start screaming for Gavin to stop, but being a bike riding novice, using his breaks was out of the question. I let go of the leash, thinking that if it was tight he would run into the rope, possibly with his neck and be yanked backward off of the bike landing on his back... option number 1... yikes, no thank you. SO...I went with option number 2, I let go of the leash thinking it would just fall the ground, or at worst, hit his chest, and fall to the ground. Unfortunately, neither of these options occurred. We were petrified to witness the leash boomerang itself around Gavin's neck and yank him off of his bike throwing him to the ground. Praise God, he had his helmet on! He still received two head abraisions. His face and neck suffered so much rope burn, it is so pitiful!

What a frightening night for us. Knowing what could have happened just freaks me out! We made him sleep in our bed so that we could keep an eye on him and make sure he did not get a concussion from the head injuries. I am so thankful that God protected him and he is ok, minus some burns. No more loose leashes for Bella and we had a crash course on break usage for Gavin... no pun intended!

Olympic Bound?

While waiting on the World Cup Us/England game to come on we were watching some college decathletes competing. He is how the conversation went:

Blake: I would like to try out for the Olympics!

Russ/Me: Oh, Really... doing what?

Blake: Hmmmm, I don't know, how about SNOWBOARDING?

Me (Trying desperately not to laugh and knowing the answer already as the most snow he has seen in his life thus far is 1 inch): Have you ever BEEN on a snowboard?

Blake: Uhhmmm, no!


Do you think we are failing at our job of keeping him "grounded in reality"? I mean... I guess he could move somewhere, at some point in his future, be surrounded by snow most of the year, and have a natural talent for snowboarding, and end up at the Olympic games of 2025 or thereafter... Though, likely not... hee hee hee

Kids Bowl Free... ?

We used our Kids Bowl Free tickets today to get out of the house for a while! The kids got to bowl free... you just have to pay for shoe rental. Apparently, shoes are golden! $3 per shoe..., seriously? How much do they cost to BUY? Well, anywho... we paid the $16 fee for all of us to have shoes, and then the games began. I must say, that was $16 well spent. The clapping, whooping, whew hews, brotherly encouragement, and fun... Priceless! Thanks Kids Bowl Free or (aka $16)!

Making God Laugh...

Gavin's preschool teacher used to say, "If you want to make God laugh, make plans!" I do not think that my boys find the "humor" in that! Nursing some broken hearts today... ;-(

Waiting....

Amy and Chris, (Russ' sister and Bro-In-Law), received the wonderful news about a month ago that they have been matched with their daughter Brenna. They are waiting for their appointment at the Chinese consulate (or wherever they go) to officially adopt their daughter and bring her home. Their were some initial concerns over her extremely low weight for her age, but they truly felt like God His divine hand in matching them with their daughter.

We are so excited to meet Brenna! I contemplated going with them to China to get Brenna, and I would have loved to have gone with them, but I also know that my heart would have probably broken to not bring home a daughter of my own. However, it was a very expensive trip, and others will be going with them. For now, I know that we will be welcoming a beautiful little girl into our family in the next month or so... for now I will be Aunt Holly. I am thankful!

Friends Forever

Last weekend the boys and I went to Wilmington for a couple of while Russ was away. We had a nice time, and on Sunday we went to my friend Trisha's house so the boys could visit with her two boys while I visited with her. We all had a nice time, though the visit was too short.

On our way out of town, the boys were asking me about Trisha and I was explaining to them how we became friends. You see, the first week of Jr. High School, I was "the girl with the bow in her hair"... (Madonna was very much a trendsetter then). The nickname was not one of fondness...as Trisha did not like me initially, and I did not even know it. But seeing as to how it was the beginning of the school year, Trisha decided to have a slumber party to meet new people, and what do you know... I was invited. I was a little scared that I was going to be the target of some slumber party prank, but much to my joy, that was not the case and Trisha and I became best friends from that night on!

Trisha and I were inseparable for so many years and I am so thankful that I still call her friend! We have been friends for 24 years! Since I have been gone from Wilmington for many years, it was so great to visit her beautiful home and see what a wonderful mom and wife she has become. I am certainly thankful that God allowed her to be a part of my life and that she is still a part of my life!

This whole thought process entered my mind, because as we were leaving Wilmington, I realized that I had lived in that town for 24 years of my life... my boys will not have that same fate... we have already moved 4 times, and growing up with the same best friends is not an option for our boys. Sadly! God will comfort and provide, I know, but it is still a little sad. With technology and the internet, they will be able to stay in better contact with the friends they do make, but it is different. I will just chose to be thankful for whatever friends God will provide for us all!

Summertime Blues... not for me!

The boys got out of school last Thursday and we have been enjoying every moment of summer so far. We started a little early with our summer celebration by going to South Georgia to Russ' Aunt Priscilla's / Uncle Durwood's to enjoy family time and tubing on the lake. The boys had a blast! Then, as soon as school was out we went to see my mom and Tim in Wilmington for a couple of days. I am so thankful for the freedom to be able to get in the car and GO! It is a little crazy transporting myself and the four boys, but it was an adventure.

I am looking forward to a fun-filled summer with my precious boys and Russ (precious too)! Lookout, we may be coming to see YOU!

Ghosts?

Landon came home from school this week and said that "Jack", a kid in his class, got into trouble. He kept talking about ghosts and Landon informed him that there were no such things as ghosts! Jack continued on, and said, "Well, what about God?"

Landon said, "God is NOT a ghost, He is a HOLY SPIRIT!"

You tell him, Landon! :-)

Mom, I wish you could have a girl!

It may have been the hours of shopping that Blake had undergone that had taken a toll on him, but as we walked into one of our final stores yesterday, he said that he wished I had a daughter. I told him that I was very thankful and blessed that God had given me my four boys and that I was happy with THEM. Well, at THAT moment, I may not have been super happy with them as only a couple of hours earlier, ONE of the those precious boys had knocked down 10+ racks of dresses in a perfect "domino fashion" in JCPenney. Nothing was left standing except for me and my four little angels!
;-) If I was ever in my life going to abandon those children, I am quite certain that would have been the moment. All, I could think about was "Stop, Drop and Roll yourself out of here"! I must have turned the color of Ronald McDonald's hair I was so embarassed. I am thinking that the super power of invisibility would have come in very handy at that moment. But, I digress...

Had the hours of shopping made Blake so delusional that he had forgotten that he wished he was an only child and argued non-stop with his other 3 siblings. Did he think that wishing for me to have a daughter would create less stress due to bickering and more time with him... In his mind, did he HONESTLY think that I had taken them out for a shopping day on the first day of Spring Break out of sheer pleasure and not NECESSITY? I later shared with them that I would have rather had a blood transfusion with an orangatang than take them all shopping with me. He may have been slightly offended by that...

Anywho... back to his wishful thinking for me. He asked why we could not just adopt a little girl. I told him that it was expensive to adopt and he says in a rather raised voice, "Well, that is like SLAVERY! You should not have to pay for a person!"

Now, do not get me wrong... I agree that slavery is wrong, but how do you shout that out at the Children's Place as everyone in there is probably wondering why my 10 year old is becoming very heated about the COST of giving someone a home. I tried telling him that you are not paying for the child, but rather for the legal costs associated with the process of adopting. Who knows what he understood about that conversation, but one thing I know... there is a pretty good chance that we were the topic of more than a few people's dinner conversations last night. Just sayin'...