Answered Prayers? Absolutely!

I was reading the following update for Zack Mayo today. (the 11 year old boy who has cancer previously mentioned in my blog):

{the nurse is starting chemo.pray for me to be strong.Ernie is always strong.Zack is sleeping-has no idea that his body is about to be invaded by toxic drugs.He is so strong& brave.So thankful God has given him to us."For assuredly I say to you,if you have faith the size of a mustard seed, you will say to this mountain...,'Move from here to there,'and it will move; and nothing will be impossible to you"~Matthew 17:20}

I was remembering times in my life when I have held on to this verse. Along with the following verse: Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. Mark 11:24

Obviously, I do not think the "whatever" in this verse means a million dollars or anything. One of the first times I remember so vividly clinging to these verses with the hope of a miracle was when my friend Kristy was pregnant and at 17 weeks, she started leaking amniotic fluid. The doctors told her that her chances of carrying her child to term were very slim. She stayed on bed rest for more weeks than I can remember until her body became toxic, they had to take the baby and fight to save her life. That whole time, I remembered praying without ceasing unlike any praying I had ever done before. I had scenarios in my head about how God could be glorified by that child making it against all the odds and what a testimony my sweet friend Kristy would have. Against all odds miracle baby that would give God all the glory. That is not the way God planned it though. God took that little baby boy home, and I was angry! Why? What kind of testimony was that for His glory? Didn't the bible say that "whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours" (Mark 11:24). Did we not believe enough? Did we not have enough faith?

Fast forward a couple of years, I had found out that I was pregnant. After a couple of months, we shared the news with our family, then a week or two later, the doctor told me that my baby had died, that it no longer had a heartbeat. I was asked if I wanted to have a DNC. Absolutely not, was my reply. My baby could not possibly be gone, maybe it was just too soon to see the heartbeat. I held on with every bit of faith and belief in my soul that my God was mighty, and he performed miracles. However, once again, God said no. Sadly, after our Gavin was born, this happened one more time to us, and again, God said no.

How was God glorified? Honestly, I do not know. One day I will have to ask Him. I do know that God allowed me to walk in that pain and suffering, never leaving nor forsaking me despite my crying out in anger and sadness. He brought me through it, and has made me a person who can minister to others who have and will go through a similar situation. I also know, that my prayer life had increased exponentially. Maybe that was how God was glorified, again, I do not know.

For today, I will pray with the Mayo family, and rejoice in the faith that they have... no matter how God answers their prayers, He is with them and will walk with them through it all, in that I have faith! I will thank God for delivering me through painful times in my life, and look forward to meeting two additional beautiful children in Heaven.