For I know the plans...

I was going over in my mind the other day, the series of events that lead us to finally feel like we had a place in South Florida. We moved there in August of 2002 and we were visiting First Baptist Weston, where we DID NOT feel called to when we first moved to FL. We had visited Sheridan Hills Baptist Church in September, but just felt it was a little far. However, after several months at FB Weston, in January 2003 we decided to try Sheridan again, and were immediately taken in by the Herwig family. They invited us to pizza that first night and the rest is history. It is my belief that God truly had a hand in leading us to Sheridan and to the Herwig family.

Well, we have been in Mt Pleasant for almost 4 months. We have really enjoyed East Cooper Baptist Church, our small group is good, the pastor is great...but we have not really connected yet. I am not hoping for an Emily replacement, that does not exist, but it would be nice to have maybe one friend that could provide an outlet for having next to zero adult stimulation most of the day. Apparently, Miss Donna Carole Kitchens does not have tons of time for me to chat her ear off when I drop off and pick up Gavin. APPARENTLY, there are other parents who need to drop off/pcik up their kids. Sheesh! Poor Miss Donna Carole! Many days, she is the ONLY other adult I come it contact with until Russ gets home. Russ says he has no friends either...at which point I just roll my eyes...it's that whole...at least he goes to work and has adult conversation while he is productively solving the problems of the world....okay, so that last part may not be true, but you get the point.

So, I pray that God will deliver me from this loneliness, Holden better start talking soon or else. :)

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future". Jeremiah 29:11

Worry Wart

This week at small group, we also discussed what heart conditions we may have that we would ask God to help us with... Hmmmmmm... how much paper do I have? Seriously, many people who know me well, know that worry, self-pity, and control are big issues for me. {Man it must take a lot to be my friend! :) } I worry about not being able to control the future (moves, etc) and then I feel sorry for myself for having to go through the struggle of moving and readjustment. I know that these things are sins, and that God is there ready and willing to take my worry, and my control and work things in my life for His good leaving me to be at peace and without self pity. I give it to Him...and then I take it back, then I give it to Him, then I take it back. It seems to be an unendless tug of war. I am pretty sure that I will give it to Him for good in about 3 years...when it is time to worry again! Ha ha ha!
I hope that is not the case. It is my prayer that today I will give it to Him and let Him have it... I have other things to worry about... hee hee hee... j/k

Thank the Lord for Forgiveness...but can I forgive?...

Sunday night at our small group our lesson was on FORGIVENESS! Yikes! Don't we all feel as if someone has wronged us in one way or another? Yet, how do we wrong Christ and yet he gave the ultimate forgiveness to us! I will be the first one to admit that I do not take that into full account when I think of others who have hurt me or wronged me in some way. So, today I ask God to forgive me, and thank Him for it, and feel the freedom of knowing that though it is a process, I do not feel wronged or hurt by anyone. I have a peace and a forgiveness in my heart that holds no grudges on this day.

So,...make sure ya'll treat me right. Ha ha ha!

Too much on the brain?...or not enough Ginko Biloba?

This morning I knew I had to be at Blake's school for the "Terrific Kid" ceremony. Apparently, he may be teetering on Christian counseling at home, but was selected as a Terrific Kid for the first 9 weeks of school. Only 2-3 kids per class were selected, blah, blah, blah. Very exciting and we are certainly proud, but I digress.
So, I had to wake Gavin up at 7:15, though he does not have to be at school until 9:00am, which left him a wreck. He is a true homebody, so after much tear shedding and whining (UGH) I bribed him into getting dressed so we could be at Blake's school at 8:00am for the ceremony.

At 8:20 we were done and leaving the school and I knew it was time to pay up. So we proceed to Burger King for some Cini Mini's to pay out my earlier bribe. We head back over to Gavin's school, which is right beside the boys' school, and we arrive with 15 minutes to spare. So we sit in the car for the next 15 minutes waiting for drop-off time. At 9:00, we go inside, taking Gavin to his class and to enjoy his day with Mrs. Donna Carole Kitchens. As we walked in, I saw a lady that I recognized from the church. She stated how funny it was that I am always up there...even when there is no school. HUH? WHAT WAS THAT? NO SCHOOL? She continues to go on about how it was fall break and there was no school today. Where have I been? I was in the classroom for an hour and a half on Wednesday helping with a fall party, and Gavin does not normally have school of Thursday's anyway. So somewhere along the way, I missed the fact that there was no school. I think I need to start taking some Ginko Biloba. Apparently, parenting four boys has made me loose my mind. Calgon...take me away.

Not age appropriate...

We were sitting at the dinner table the other night and Russ was telling me about an instructor who was in the hospital with kidney stones. This poor man has many ailments and this was just icing on the cake. Landon, being the nosy child that he is, was asking what was wrong and what kidney stones were. So, Russ and I go into the anatomy of the urethra and the kidneys, etc., etc., etc., when Blake abruptly stopped the conversation. He very passionately stated, "I DO NOT BELIEVE THIS IS AGE APPROPRIATE INFORMATION!"

Really? Oh, he cracks me up!

...DAILY DRAMA...

I find myself wanting to write, yet not finding the time...however, I blog in my head on the way to take the kids here and there...but that does not make it to paper (or computer) before I forget what I wanted to talk about. Why do I blog, you may ask? It is a sense of feeling like I am not crazy when I can laugh about my life...and the craziness going on day to day with these four boys.

Right now, the boys just got home from school and were MADE to practice drum and guitar by "Mom the Dictator"... leading to much drama and sass...mostly from Blake. Now, it is onto homework time which is what I like to call "2-3 hours of daily Hell"! Seriously, the day is so long as it is, then they tack on sooo much homework, of things that have many times not even been taught during the day. I have not been called to homeschool my children up to this point, so I am not really sure why I find myself teaching my children at home when they get home from 7 hours of school. (Oh, it could be the 30 kids in their class, which is absolutely RIDICULOUS!!!) It has done much to wear down a very fragile relationship between Blake and I, and with all the hormonal changes he is going through and his extreme mood swings, I certainly do NOT need help in wearing at our relationship! Sheesh!

Dear Lord...HELP! I know...this too shall pass! I need to take it to the cross...something I have not done enough of lately.

All in Due Time

Let me start by saying that Sunday School to Russ and I has always been a pretty tight peer group. Other couples in our same age range, in a similar life stage, studying the word of God together, praying with one another and ministering to one another. Moving is difficult and we have always felt like our Sunday School class was more like our extended family than just a place to go study the bible, though that aspect was very important.

Upon our move to Charleston, we felt it increasingly necessary to not only be in the Word, but to connect with a group of like minded individuals that we could "do life with". We believe that Christ has to be the center of our life, our family and our relationships. We find it necessary to be with others equally yoked people who can lift us up in our struggles, pray for us, cry with us in our despair, and laugh with us in our joys... this past Sunday was our first experience with trying to find our group. Our church has two types of classes...those that are "peer groups" (ex. Newlywed, Married with School age children, and Empty Nesters) and electives classes (open to all couples, singles of all ages). We thought we would try our peer group for the above mentioned reason. So we went to an amazing worship service and then headed to our "class". Well, to say that we were the youngest in the class would have been an understatement. I realize that I am in denial about my "real age", but the class consisted of "Parents of Parents, a.k.a. Grandparents NOT Parents of School Aged Children. I digress!

So, we ventured down the hall looking for some others that looked similar to us... convinced that the Newlywed class was our closest fit... I told you that I was in denial... and Russ said NO! We decided to go to the class we were "supposed" to go to. Right before class started another guy walked in...one that had on "child pickup tags". He was very nice and said it was his first time in class as well. He said his wife was out of town, but he thought he would try the class. He introduced himself and Seung and we were pleased to see that we found one other person in the class with children in our kids age group. When class ended, we quickly departed, after doing a brief study on Luke...

Well, Sunday night was being promoted as Link'd Up. This was where the church was connecting people with Community Groups. We had been planning to attend for over a month and we guessed that maybe this was were the "doing life with" people would come from. Once we arrived, we immediately saw Seung. He smiled, instantly remembered us and we saw that he was a Community Group leader. Hmmm, interesting. So, he showed us where to take the kids and said to enjoy our evening.

We dropped off the kids, and got in the buffet line, along with hundreds of other people or all ages and marital status. The tables were set up in rows all the way from the back of the room to the front and the announcer stated that their was some seating up front. We decided to walk blindly toward the front until we found 2 open seats together. We heard our names called out, and Seung asked if we were looking for a place to sit...2 open seats right across the table from him. So, we took a seat. We enjoyed conversing with him and met another of the husbands from the group whose wife was also out of town. We talked about our kids...and discovered that Gavin was in the same class as his son Micah. (Miss Donna Carole Kitchens) Micah was the first friend that Gavin made when he started school. We discovered that our older kids went to Belle Hall and though they were not in the same classes, Landon's teacher was the mother-in-law of the other husband that we met. We laughed at what a "small world" it was and I silently thanked God for his perfect plan and for leading us so obviously to a community group that we are really looking forward to joining.

We finished the evening and went to pick up the boys, who were not too happy to be going back to church for the second time in a day...they could not stop talking about how AWESOME the time was that evening. They were excited about the memory verse that they had to learn for next week and the joy that had seemed a long way away flooded back into our family. As Pastor Buster Brown said yesterday morning...if Christ is in the center...it will stick! I finally feel like we might be breaking free, free from the loneliness, the isolation, and the sadness. Thank you Jesus for your Mercy and Grace~

Big Brown hearts...

Well, I spoke with Landon's teacher this evening after a 2nd grade "parents only" meeting at the school. I needed to discuss a potential problem with a bully before anything occurred with my Landon. She assured me that he was doing well adjusting and that she could already tell that he was a very sweet boy. DUH! He definitely has the biggest heart in our family. I told her that we were coming from a private Christian school and that Landon was very happy that they would not be drilling evolution down their throats this year... heh hem, where does he get this stuff from. ;) She was a little tickled and said...no not this year! I also informed her that Landon is worried that if he tells anyone that he loves Jesus that he will get a "strike" and end up walking the fence at recess. Though Russ and I have both reassured him that this will NOT occur, he still seems to be a little concerned. She told me to tell Landon that SHE LOVES JESUS! She is a member of the church we have been attending and was very excited to tell us all of the great things they have for the kids there. Of course, as soon as I returned home, I informed Landon of her message and he was elated! He said, "Did you ask her if I could bring my bible to school?" Isn't he just the cutest thing? Big heart!

She also informed me that Blake's teacher was also a Christian and a VERY GODLY WOMAN! YAY! Blake seemed to also feel a sense of relief and actually knuckled up with excitement about the news. Thank you, Lord! Oh, how we have been blessed by two Godly teachers who will know my boys' hearts! It is still not the wonderful Christian influence from FRCA being poured into our boys with each day, but I will continue to pray for them! May it be a blessed year!

Update...

Good News... Day 2... Sweatshirt and Blake's lunchbox from Day 1...found and brought home.

Bad News... Gavin's lunchbox that Blake borrowed due to his being lost... now left at school.

To all of you wonderful parents out there... HELP! Do I start consequences? ...taking away priveledges? Do we need to have him examined by a doctor? Is this normal? Abnormal? What is wrong with my child?

And they're off...

So yesterday was the first day of school for Blake and Landon...first day of public school at that. Blake is starting 4th (MY WORD...I'm NOT THAT OLD, am I?), and Landon is going into 2nd. They decided that they would like to ride the bus, and seeing as to how I cannot do anything but drop them off out front along with a gazillion other parents adding extreme combustion and frustration, I decided...why not. The bus was supposed to come at 7:01 am and stop directly in front of our house according to the bus list, so we were all out there at 6:46 am just to be sure there was no chance at all of being left behind. For 25 minutes we saw NO ONE! We knew the neighbor boys were supposed to also be riding on the first day, but no sign whatsoever of them. Blake was just about beside himself devastated by the possibility that they would be late. He went back and forth..."just take us"..."we'll wait"..."let's just go". Finally around 7:15am, we saw one of their buddies and their mom. I asked Will's mom what was up with the late bus and she replied that it was always more like 7:15 rather than 7:00. Good to know!

Well, the boys were off! The day went by for Gavin and Holden and I with little excitement. My homebody Gavin stayed in his PJ's all day, even when we had to run to Walmart for some ice cream fixin's for the afterschool party we were planning. We made it back in time to cook the cupcakes, pop the popcorn, set up the party table, make the signs, put out some chairs and wait in the driveway for the bus to arrive about 3:05 pm and drop the boys off right where it picked them up...right in front of our house. At that time, the plan was for all of their buddies who would be getting off with them to stop in and make their own ice cream sundae and decorate their own cupcake.

Well, at 3:00 the boys come running around the corner from the front of the neighborhood. When I asked where they came from, they said the front entrance of the neighborhood. When I asked them WHY they did not get off the bus where they got on it, they replied that the bus stopped, they did not know if it would stop again, so they got off and walked home! REALLY! As we stood in the driveway, we watched the bus come down the road and promtly stop in front of our house and let all their friends off. Blake says, "Well, it looks like we got home sooner!"

Needless to say, we discussed with them the importance of staying on and getting off safely in front of the house to which they reluctantly agreed.

Then, Blake confessed that he left his sweatshirt on the bus on the way to school. Really?! DAY 1? Oh, but apparently, it is okay, because his bus driver, Mr. Wilson, turned it into the office! Then as we were doing our nighttime routine of getting lunchboxes ready...he realized that he left his lunchbox on the bus in the afternoon. Please, please, please give me wisdom in raising this child. He claimed it was NOT HIS FAULT! I guess it was the magical fairy who flew past him on the bus and wrestled his sweatshirt and lunchbox away from him while sprinkling memory erasing fairy dust on him so that he would not remember a thing! Yep...that had to be whose FAULT it was! Seriously! (We then had the "take responsibility" talk!)

Overall, the boys said their first day was good. Blake said the library was HUGE!!! He was thrilled to check out his first two books! Landon said that he walked by and noticed how humongous it was also! Landon also informed me that even though the teacher would not talk about Jesus that they would NOT be learning about evolution this year!

We gave each of the boys an assignment for their first day...remember the name of at least 1 kids name in your class. Blake very excitedly reported that he had a boy in his class named Bennett. I asked him if that was all he could remember and he said that he had tried to remember everyone's name, but they just slipped right out of his head...all 27... must be that fairy dust again. (Yes-I said 27, he has 29 kids in his class, but hopefully, they are going to make a new class, fingers crossed).
Landon, of course, knew several names if not all! Of course, the social aspect of Landon is probably what will cause him to score many a "strike" from his teacher's discipline policy! Oh, my boys! Calgon...you know the drill!

I would like more ...

We were sitting at the table eating lunch on Saturday when Gavin (very politely) says, "May I have some more turds please?"

"What?" Russ asks him with a slight hint of confusion in his voice.

"Well, whatever they are called." Gavin replies.

"Do you mean "tater tots"? Russ asks him as we all just about choke on our food as we double over in laughter.

Gavin looks at us all, a bit confused himself by now, just laughs and says, "okay...tater tots".

This kid CRACKS me up!

Judgement Day

Today, Russ and I had to meet with the admissions team and preschool director at the preschool we are trying to get Gavin into. It is at the Christian school affiliated with the church we have been visiting. SInce it is a covenant school, we needed to go in and tell them our testimony of our salvation experience so that they could recommend or not recommend our family for admission into the school. Let me start by saying, that is great! I am fine with the interview process and with telling them all about my excitement about coming to Christ and the impact Christ has had on my life.

What I will say that I am not too crazy about is the waiting... as we sit and wait for a decision board to decide if we are worthy or not to attend, it frustrates me. I KNOW my walk with Christ. I KNOW the power of grace and forgiveness God has given me undeservingly! I hate feeling like someone other than my Savior is judging me based on a 30 minute meeting. I will say, that my life is not wrapped in a pretty little bow perfect and unblemished. Every single day is a new day and a new struggle to make the right choices to follow my God and to seek His face. Not everyday do I give it all to God. I am not a perfect Christian, there was only one of those and because of Him, I am not perfect, but forgiven.

So, we will see...

That's Not Fair.......

If I have heard those words once, I've heard them ten thousand times! Really! I know life is not fair... I have lived it longer than the three boys of mine that constantly tell me how unfair it is! "It's not fair, he doesn't gets to go to a private school. It's not fair, his school starts later than ours. It's not fair, he gets to have his own room. It's not fair ...", the list goes on and on.

Today, my reply was simple. Do you think Jesus was complaining as he was dying on the cross. Yelling at his Father in Heaven...shouting, "It's not fair...I have been blameless and without sin my whole life and yet here I am being beaten and tortured while nailed to cross...dying for the entire world, most of whom could care less, just so a bunch of sinful selfish people can experience forgiveness and Heaven. That is sooooo unfair!!!!!"

So, I will take no fair... and just be thankful that Jesus did too.

Is it just me?

Still Walmart...different state...

So, I took the boys into the Walmart hair salon for a shape up/trim. The hairstylist was quite talkative to me... a total stranger. I learned all about her recent fainting spell at work a week ago that landed her in the hospital. While there, she found out that she was pregnant, which she found quite shocking since her tubes are tied, as well they might should be, since she has 9, count them 9 children. I am somewhat certain that this was NOT a religious decision seeing as to how she is going through a divorce from her second husband and she was impregnated by her boyfriend of eleven months. Her boyfriend does not yet know about this pregnancy, (and unfortunate miscarriage shortly thereafter), as he lives in Minnesota and suffers from high blood pressure, she concluded that he did not need to know because it would probably just cause him unnecessary stress. Total strangers are free game... who cares what my blood pressure is or how much stress she could cause me by all of her business that she unloaded upon my shoulders or the fact that I have to explain all of her choices to my big eared children (figuratively - of course)!

So, is it just another day in my life...or does this kind of thing happen to others as well?

Why Me?

This morning in church, the pastor had a very powerful message. I found it to be very true and thought I would share. He stated that there are two type of people that come to church:
1. Those who think that if you do A, B, and C ... then God will do D, E, and F. In otherwords... if I do this this and this, then God will do this and that for me. That God's love is conditional on our actions. I have found myself in that place more times than I would like to recount. In a place where I felt like maybe things were not going my way because I was not loving God enough or doing enough to please him. Or... that things were going well for me because I was being a pretty good Christian! How sad would that be?

2. Those who think, WHY ME? Why would God in all His perfection forgive ME of all the nastiness that goes through my mind, or comes out of my mouth. Why would He pluck me out of all the unbelievers around me and allow me the ability to see His truth? Why would a God so PERFECT and SINLESS love someone as IMPURE and SINFUL as ME? I do not know WHY? But, I am so very very thankful!

If I am honest, I would have to say, that I do not fully appreciate ENOUGH the true GRACE and MERCY of my God! I tend to take my salvation for granted some days, just going through the motions, caught up in the daily hustle and bustle of life. It is my prayer, that I will take the time to slow down and that EVERY DAY and EVERY MOMENT I will remember the Cross that my God died upon for ME!